East Anglia - iLiveHere: Best & Worst UK Towns Reviewed

Bedford – get ready for the nice smell of strong urine

Bedford had changed in the last 30 years or so. The Bus Station had been refurbished into the 21st century. So had the Car park, What still remains the same the Loo’s still smell of rotting Pilchards and Piss. Sadly If you wanted to go to the Loo in the centre of town in the […]

“Dirty GY” a.k.a Great Yarmouth

I’ve lived in Great Yarmouth my entire life. What I’ve found is, the entire area and surrounding areas you have to pick out the best and the worst. You have your sh*t areas like GY, Southtown, Cobholm, Lowestoft, but there are some nice areas like Caister, Bradwell, Carlton and Belton. Gorleston is somewhere in between. […]

Stevenage is a town where you keep your head down when walking

I lived in Stevenage for just over 30 years. I went to school, worked and ‘got around’ the town on a daily basis and got to learn the lay of the land and how it changed from an early age. Growing up in St. Nicholas, the Oval was a don’t go area, the ‘oval mob’ […]

Bedford and Kempston “Your Papers Please!!”

Living in Kempston, Bedford, Bedfordshire

The people of Bedford and Kempston are not of the same human race as normal people, as they are the result of generational fear and paranoia, like the Stasi in East Germany or the the KGB, like in the fallen Soviet Socialist Republics. They watch you like Hawks, treating you with total suspicion and like […]

Purfleet, Essex: home to *****, druggies and jobless layabouts

Welcome to Garrison Estate Purfleet, home to *****, druggies and jobless layabouts. At first glance you would think it’s a lovely place to live with lots of green spaces and historical buildings, but once you walk about you soon begin to see it’s true colours. Purfleet has one school one shop and a few beaten […]

Histon, Cambridge: you will never meet a duller bunch of **** candles

It’s all about the pubs in this place and you will never meet a duller bunch of **** candles lingering around the bar at the King Bill Pub, anywhere else, within a 50 mile radius. The pub also has a back room where the ***** are segregated from the general population of mongrels at the […]

Come to Weeting, we have a steam festival and that’s about it

Come to Weeting, Norfolk if you want to see nothing other than 9 year old wannabe gangsters, dog excrement covered streets and a bunch of eccentric yokels. Amazing what 1000 years of local breeding can do. On your arrival, after getting stuck at the station gates, obviously you will first see the “neighbourhood heroes” of […]

Dereham – More like Drearam. Stay away if you’re not a local

I had the dubious pleasure of being a resident of Dereham for 18 long years. In that time, Dereham went from being a bog standard market town to something akin to a rotting corpse full of apathy and yearning. The town slogan should be, “Abandon All Hope Ye Who Enter Here”. Driving through the town […]

Felixstowe in a nutshell after a 2 week break

Pros: Beautiful countryside, sunny, beaches, friendly-ish people (but a bit weird). That’s it. Cons: Fat, ugly, tattooed sheep (the blokes are still wearing Gold rope chains and earings, **** me, about 30 years too late, even spotted a mullet for crying out loud!). Floppy haired little ***** with scooters that seem to be everywhere, **** […]

Felixstowe: it is just like the film ‘Hot Fuzz’

Been living in Felixstowe 6 weeks now having moved up from Hertfordshire. What a strange place. Don’t get me wrong, beautiful countryside and lovely beaches (some, apart from the chavy end where the Amusement Arcades are) but crikey these people are weird, i just don’t know what to make of ’em. Really friendly on the […]

Wootton – located on the darkest recess of Satan’s brown eye

Wootton is a horror story within itself, If you believe in Ghouls and Witches this is the place. Located on the most darkest recess of Satan’s brown eye, the people there are mostly old people who live there, Waiting to ripped from the fabric of life. Wootton has a fleet of Ambulances, ready on stand […]

Bedford – billed to be the Garden of Eden, but ended up like Stalinist Russia!

Bedford was billed to be the Garden of Eden. Where the second coming was going to happen, the only coming was the the **** Invasion of the London Pygmies, from the Luton and London overspill. These Scabs/***** are the problem, they bring their culture with them. Some have the look that could turn Milk Sour […]