Living in Maryport, Cumbria

Maryport: The Anti-Social Landfill of Europe

Poor souls who stray into the feral residential areas of Maryport are presumed dead until seen again.

Living in Kendal, Cumbria

Kendal – Cumbria’s knock off Lancaster

Looking for a place that’s got drugs and drunks out in the street at 2 am on Saturday morning? Then Kendal is the place.

Living in Longtown, Cumbria

Oh Longtown… You suck!

Longtown has a long history, especially with it being on the border of England and Scotland. Although ask many of the locals who were educated from the 80s onwards and they couldn't tell you any of it.

Living in Carlisle, Cumbria

Carlisle: the people who inhabit this city are not quite right

Carlise: a land you will never forget and unless you have a raging drug problem, you will never visit again.

Living in Carlisle, Cumbria

Carlisle, welcome to yesterday… today!

Why not give sunny Carlisle a try, simply turn off at junction 42 of the M6 and hopefully no one will ever find out you've been.