Living in Dearne Valley, South Yorkshire

Dearne Valley (Valley of Death!)

Populated by Barnsley, Doncaster and Rotherham throwbacks they interbred with locals.

Living in Ferryhill, County Durham

Ferryhill: full of inbred jobless drugged up muppets

Feel sorry for the decent folk of Ferryhill, its been reduced to a holding pen for The Jeremy Kyle Show.

Living in Ferryhill, County Durham

Ferryhill: What a f**king sh*theap

There are many attractions in Ferryhill, such as watching intoxicated slags fighting outside of the pubs.

Living in Keighley, West Yorkshire

Keighley: a portrait of a town at its very worst

When you walk into Keighley, the first thing you'll see is gum and spit everywhere. The majority of Keighley is full of 13 yr old mothers and there 15 yr old baby daddies.

Living in Keighley, Yorkshire

Keighley: the most depressing and dull place I’ve ever encountered

The more time I spent in Keighley, the more I felt I was trapped in a groundhog day loop of repeating misery.