Living in Bolton, Greater Manchester

Bolton… beyond the term “dreadful”

I've never encountered so many fat, ugly, dishevelled people nor persons exhibiting signs of mental illness in such concentrations as Bolton.

Living in Bury, Greater Manchester

Bury: a difficult place to like

Bury has its own perfume - Eau de Weed

Living in Shaw, Greater Manchester

Shaw: The Place That Joy Forgot

All in all, Shaw is a sh*thole, and thank god I'm leaving for good. If you like being a tw@t, it could be the place for you

Living in Failsworth, Greater Manchester

Failsworth: a town of hard working individuals & lazy inbred pond life

KFC/Tesco Car parks have become a homing beacon for Failsworth's chavy offspring to congregate around when they are not at the Metro Stop.

Living in Sholver & Moorside, Oldham

Sholver, think of it as a giant category C prison built on a hill side

Sholver & Moorside: the views are good... to all the other parts of Greater Manchester where everyone would rather be.