If you are ever driving down the A12 and you hear on the radio that there is congestion prior to the M25 junction, you may choose to divert off the A12 at the previous junction and unknowingly find yourself in the Monaco of the *****. This ‘pricipallity’ houses the royal family of the ***** and […]
Category: Essex
The worst places to live in Essex
Upminster, Essex.
Mmmmmmmmmmmmmmm….not much to say about upminster….. HA im kidding. i got a whole bunch of stuff. Firstly the park is set in the centre of the town…. opposite McDonalds. All the rudies fill up on grease then off to the off licence to booze up then over to the park. They all congrigate at night […]
Dagenham-The jewel in the **** crown?
Dagenham has turned **** breeding into an exact science. they start from babies with their baby-sized burb hats and tracksuits, being wheeled to the post office on a monday morning in convoy. It is like watching an episode of Rawhide, all these fat heffers driven on by the promise of government handouts, their hair tied […]
Billericay lies in the shadow of its more important smarter sister Brentwood
Like Dickens’ ‘A tale of two cities” Billericay lies in the shadow of it’s larger more important smarter sister Brentwood, itself not without the spreading curse of Chavism. A more sinister shadow cast upon the smallish town of Billericay (It’s dumb male residents immortalised in Ian Dury’s “Billericay Dickie”) is the dark influence of Basildon. […]
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Clacton on Sea, Essex, so incestuous that it is twinned with itself
I should first point out that I do not live there (in a sense does anyone?) I have only visited. I may be foolish but I am not bloody stupid! Clacton or ‘Clackers’ or ‘London by the sea’ is a seaside town (the clue is in the name) that is so incestuous that it is […]
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Witham (A.K.A. Shitham)
A housing overspill and series of industrial estate off the beloved A12 between Chelmsford and Colchester. Whilst the two towns either side of Witham can just about still claim some culture (well Colchester anyway when squaddies aren’t rampaging) Witham cannot. A soulless cultural vacum that has no real reason to exist except perhaps to house […]
Rochford a.k.a Lesser Southend
Southend became a ChavTown a long time ago, what was once a holiday destination has been replaced by columns of fast food restaurants, Sports Direct shops and **** Hangouts… Which at night develops into a hotspot worthy of being bombed. Rochford is 5 miles away, used to be a quiet town away from Southend where […]
Hornchurch, Essex
Hornchurch has long been a nice little place to go for a beer with friends of an evening. Up until recently there was no trouble in the evening on the way home. But, things are changing. The ***** from Romford (just up the road) have realised that Romford isn’t safe for them any more. Because […]
Stansted/Elsenham, Essex
Smallish town Stansted & nearby Elsenham both have a decent amount of **** that loiter with intent of looking stupid. Stansted has its main problems at their railway station where several dozen can gather and light the area up with their sovereign rings and rope chain necklaces and bracelets. Nearby Elsenham, also have a generous […]
Harlow
I know you’re thinking “what else could I gain from reading another article on Harlow?”, but trust me there is more. For a start, I’m not sure how many other towns could claim to have adverts warning of ASBOs on their bus services. The local authorities claim that only seven of these orders have been […]
Harlow
This has to be the biggest hole in Essex. I swear, one look and all the teenage single mums from all over the shop come running to claim off the state. If you can get through the Harvey centre without encountering some drugged up, 14 year old tart, *** in mouth, pushing her screaming brat […]
Harlow
This is the worst town i have ever had the misfourtune to reside in! Not only is the town overun by ***** but it seams that it was actually designed by them! For example, the train station is a 15min walk from the town centre to which there are only buses during the weekday rush […]
