For those of you un-familiar with Guest House Paradiso, and the character played by Rick Mayall (Richard **** – pronounced ‘Thwaite’), I shall be using the term “Thwaite” in replacement for the word ****. Now then, back to mansfield. I have lived in this grotty hell hole since i was 14, through no fault of […]
Category: East Midlands
The worst places to live in the East Midlands
Market Harborough
Behind the beautiful looking town which costs a fortune to live, as a sought after area lurks junkies, ****’s and ****’s. You cannot walk through this town especially the square without being harrassed by a junkie for 20p, the ****’s are worse though trying to prove to ther other **** friends their ‘ARDENESS by beating […]
Ashbourne
Gateway to Ultraboredom and Chava Hell […]
Irthlingborough, home of the Wellingborough ner’do’well
Irthlingborough is the breeding ground for the greater spotted Wellingborough ****, and is where ***** are raised and trained before being allocated swagger-and-stare time in the local capital of Wellingborough. As such, Irthlingborough constitutes the local university for future *****, who are encouraged to come and study here for a well-rounded and comprehensive **** education.The […]
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Heanor
I simply cannot believe that Heanor has not yet been added to the list of Chaviest towns going. I myself am not from Heanor, which frankly is evident from my use of the English language and a computer, but i do have the horror of working in the hell hole 5 days a week. Now […]
Kettering, Northants AKA Kett’rin
Picture this a young lad about 12 years of age and 4 ½ feet high baseball cap at ninety degrees in a imitation addidas tracksuit, with trouser legs tucked into his socks (of course, is definitely the height of fashion). This lad is strutting around, *** in one hand jewellery al over the over, outside […]
Grimsby & Cleethorpes
Grimsby is the largest town in the relative calm that is Lincolnshire. If you should ever visit, come equipped with a Burberry baseball cap and socks tucked into your shellsuit bottoms otherwise you will stand out like a sore non-**** thumb! I suppose everyone who’s added their town to this impressive iLiveHere list will think […]
Northampton, observe our loverly wide range of *****
If you ever find yourself in Northampton (which i hope for your sake you don’t)… please take the time to observe our loverly wide range of *****. They can be found in the loverly Kings Heath. Now please take my advice never walk through this place and if your driving don’t be on your own! […]
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Buxton – don’t be fooled by the beautiful surroundings
Don’t be fooled by the beautiful surroundings, the pure clear spring water, or the roman baths, this town is home to the highest concentration of *******, *****, smackheads, kids with kids, air max wearers, and wannabe gangsters in the whole of the country. If you include the diseased cesspool of Fairfield, buxton’s cancerous growth, then […]
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Come to Wigston and sample the smells, the broken glass & the syringes
The Black Death revisited. This small town, consisting of Wigston itself and the *even* worse South Wigston, is quite simply one of the most ******, burberry, teenage pregnancy, stabbing, piss holes in the UK. If you drive down one of the main roads, from the (slightly) nicer town of Oadby, quality of life drops from […]
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Higham Ferrers
Basically Higham Ferrers is a small town/large village on the outskirts of Rushden (chavcity) Northants. Higham Ferrers is all focused around the main road going through the centre of the town, if you drive along the high street higham comes across as a charming quaint little town rich in heritage and history with winding streets […]
Worksop
THE **** PUB GUIDE – WORKSOP 2005 Mid-week. Why not entertain a few friends to a quiet drink in the local. My favourite local pub is The Innings on Prospect Hill. Sounds lovely doesn’t it? You can enjoy an ice-cold Stella while treating the good lady to half a snakebite and black. Be careful not […]
