Living in Eakring, Nottinghamshire

Eakring: not the end of the earth but you sure can see it from there

If anyone that lives In Eakring is ever asked where they live, I'm sure the response would be 'Where's that?!'

Living in Newark-on-Trent

Newark-on-Trent, what is there to be proud of?

I've lived in Newark-on-Trent for almost 20 years and can't stand the place.

Living in Sutton-in-Ashfield

Sutton-in-Ashfield: avoid eye contact and you’ll be just fine

Mobility scooters and micro scooters seem to be the transport of choice in Sutton-in-Ashfield, depending on which side of 30 you are.

Living in Ollerton, Nottinghamshire

Ollerton: the most boring place to live

New Ollerton = old biddy central and a load of manky chavs. DO NOT come here, for your own sanity, don't even visit.

Living in Sneinton, Nottingham

Sneinton, Nottingham, do not come here for peace

It really is true that you don't know any place until you actually come to live in Sneinton.