Living in Coventry, West Midlands
Written by Anonymous Visitor and posted in West Midlands

The only place in the country where living there could be confused as a punishment. The hellhole which is Coventry, is clear when experienced what it is really like, and it is evident to all who have dipped their toe in it, hopefully you will never have to. It is bad enough to be the furthest away from water in the country, but get a whiff of coventry and you will know, all is lost. While avoiding stepping in human excrement in traversing its narrow, empty, soulless streets that resemble something out of an apocalyptic hell zone, it’s a good idea to avoid the place unless you have a strong stomach, well stocked with anti-depressants, and a clear exit plan.

City Centre – When you really are feeling up for a challenge, the worst is the best that the worst can do. The city centre, in all its glories has about as much charm as a week old turd, and if you can circumnavigate the human faeces under foot, the everlasting stench of arse, and unkempt numptys asking for the time, you just might be able to make it all the way to the train station unscathed, but that is asking too much.

Each shop peculiarly has a closing down sign that seems to interchange between giro day, to keep the coventrians on their toes obviously, got to spend that money or it gets pissed away on the overcrowded, over extortionate hellholes called coventrys bendy and double decked buses, if you can’t get through having to emotionally fight your way with mental fortitude, from point a to point b without feeling drained of life, then you might as well walk.

Employment – Forget it, too much unionism and nepotism in Coventry to even make it possible to get a decent job, if any at all. Most people that work decent jobs in Coventry, whether or not they are from Coventry, usually live just outside of the city such as bedworth, nuneaton, and meriden, and other Coventry fringe towns, (most likely to steer clear of the minorities and other foreigners that are rife in the city) but well within driving distance by car.

This is well known now that white flight has been in full swing in Coventry for many years now and with this transient trend makes it even harder for the usual applicant to get a decent job as these are now reserved for the ‘beleaguered, overrun upper class’ of Coventry aka white flighters, courtesy of labour socialist unions and other favour for a favour opportunists. Any chance of getting a job in Coventry is usually made by giving up and settling for the ‘jobs no one else wants to do’, ending up working dead end jobs down sorting warehouses and packing plants.

Pay is low and a day’s wage is the equivalent of a bus ticket there and back, making it completely pointless. It’s well advice to stay away from Coventry when looking for work unless you are knee deep in friends who are lucky enough to have jobs there already or personally know the managers, otherwise you will be punching smoke.

Entertainment – When thinking of a best time to enjoy yourself in the city, the first things that might come to your mind are pubs and clubs, but nope, they’ve shut all those down. There is one main pub in the city centre not far from the transport museum, but unless you want to risk getting stabbed by the usual louters on a Friday night, it’s wise to avoid. The next super attraction is the skydome, a place where you can contract an std from riding the escalator, a place where the overpowering smell of stale urine and poop is overwhelming.

Making for a quick exit, you will find yourself in front of the 10 years new Ikea, which is probably not the place where you would want to spend a blind date, but navigating the labyrinth of the interior would probably inspire you to try your hand at superman off the 5th floor.

Social – Coventry is probably one of the least social places in the country due to the total lack of empathy and the everlasting hostility to the ‘dreaded’ outsider. This is not to indifferent, it is well known to all that Coventry is the place of ostracisation, hence to the sent there is to be screwed for life.

Understandably, the ostrasation in coventry comes from a detest or fear of the different, which in any case comes from coventrys over reliance of in-group thinking and its hyper-collectivist/tribal thinking in both education and in the workplace, and this is indeed what Coventry is, since there is a very persuasive air of segregation in Coventry, which doesn’t at first seem apparent, only when you realise the staring is worse than in the Cotswolds, you realize what you are working with.

Totally not a friendly place, Coventry is a place where a passer-by is most likely to greet you by spitting at the floor, than with a smile or handshake, why this is no one knows, the unfriendliness most likely ties into coventrys ostracisation image. If you are looking for a place to socialise and make new friends, then Coventry may not be for you, time and time again people have to retreat to London as Coventry isn’t too friendly to foreigners especially since alot of the ‘beleaguered flighters’ that work in coventry had moved from there in the first place, so when out and about expect some level of resentment or hostility.

Its best to avoid Coventry the only thing that it is known for is ostracisation, easier benefits due to coventrys transient population (carrot and stick), a 3 floor primark, and it’s easy escape routes.

  • Lou Lou

    What a load of absolute tosh. I have lived & worked in Coventry for the best part of my life. The city has 2 fantastic university’s, loads of good pubs, a nationally renowned theatre, and a huge hospital that services a large part of the Warwickshire area, local libraries, home to a brilliant Rugby team etc etc. There is also easy access to the national road & train networks due to it’s location in the middle of the country. True it doesn’t have many restaurants in the city centre, but you only have to travel a couple of miles out to find many good places for food. You clearly have no concept of the city, people would not move to Bedworth, Nuneaton or Meriden, the contrast in the house prices would put paid to that. Bedworth & Nuneaton are somewhat less appealing and cheaper than Coventry and Meriden is in the Borough of Solihull and priced accordingly. You are in fact a prat and I for one am glad you didn’t appreciate Coventry it means you won’t return and we won’t have to put up with you, but I guess you only visited to avail yourself of the Primark that you mentioned.

  • Luther

    I’m sorry to hear about the Buses, you should get a better job, a Mercedes is much more accommodating. I’m guessing you’re pretty old now since you call it a “Giro” so if you’re still getting the bus you’ve done pretty s**t a life. I hope you got the poo off of your shoe in the end.

  • j barratt

    i dropped in on the way from the airport having travelled overnight. Popped into wetherspoons for a breakfast a nice cup of tea, it was 10am remember. The rest of the pub, old men and also young women with pushchairs were knocking back lagers! What a life they lead.

  • I’ve found a worse if smaller place in the vicinity of Birmingham. Living by it. Looks like time to move again, trying to find a non-dump is elusive as it gets.

  • Dan Adams

    Did Donald Trump write this?

  • Disgruntled Coventrian

    I can only assume the writer’s desire to remain anonymous must stem from the failure to get through an interview for a position in Coventry, for which they are eminently unsuitable, and could have been outed by the H.R. Department who saw this individual. The obsession with human faeces is worrying and is probably part of this person’s downfall at interview stage, because it can be imagined that this was reflected in the responses given. Like any city, Coventry has it’s share of problems, but thankfully, the fact that this person has no desire to live here, we have one less!

  • Sam Jenkins

    As someone who lives and grew up in Coventry I am outraged at the generalisations made in this article, but also complete lack of truth. If you’d done your research and made any attempt to speak to anyone living in Coventry you’d know there’s more than just that ‘one pub’ mentioned above in the city centre. The nightlife might not rival that of Birmingham but with two universities in Coventry it’s not as bad as made out above. I find it hard to believe you come from a background with any diversity of race in as you seem to paint the rise of immigrants in Coventry in such a negative light. You have completely tarnished everyone with the same brush based on the judgments you had about the apparent lack of wealth in Coventry. People in Coventry do struggle, as people do anywhere and speaking as someone who’s lived in Coventry all my life, who often goes out into town on Friday/Saturday nights I find the judgments you have made prejudice and unfounded. Coventry is also known for the transport museum, for being where London Hackney carriages (black cabs), oh and incase you’re unsure why the city centre is made up of the not so attractive and rather grey brutalist architecture it’s because of the blitz during WW2 and so the city was rebuilt, causing great strain on the community and economy. Speaking from experience I have never had anyone shake my hand and welcome me to their city when I’ve been anywhere else in the UK but hey, maybe that’s because I’m from Coventry and must give off that unfriendly, diseased impoverish vibe that just screams ‘don’t approach’.

  • Libby Lolly Licker

    Ha what a load of absolute bollocks!!! Ok it’s not Mayfair, but to insinuate that we’re all a bunch of spitting, jobless chavs is a tad unfair!
    Yep there are large areas of deprivation in the city, but I just love how you remark that many escape to the outer towns to live… For example Bedworth!! Like that’s somehow better! Have you actually been to Bedworth??!
    There’s good and bad everywhere and if your attempt at humour had been successful, I may have forgiven the tone of the article, but sadly it missed the mark!

  • spacecat5

    Um to all to all people upset and angry with this post I dont think its supposed to be taken seriously :p

  • Sophie Siddall

    Last time I checked I get minimum wage (£7.20/hr) and work in coventry (bus £4/day). yes it is a s**t hole but it’s our s**t hole… I have left a couple of times but always end up coming back… because it’s the people in coventry (the ones I know and love) that make it my home so whoever wrote this needs to come on board the coventry train or go back to school and get educated properly. Cov was bigger than brum at one point until the blitz broke off we have tourists who come and go just like any other city/town. We held one of the biggest car factories at one point. I could go on all day but fact is there’s always positives but only positive people will ever find/seek them….!!!

  • Anya Ysabella

    I go to university in Coventry… and as far as ‘being accepted as an outsider’ goes it’s pretty good! I’ve met some wonderful people there, and there are even some places in Coventry that are beautiful. However, I do agree that the place is dirty and lacks a huge amount of empathy… but what place doesn’t? The homeless on the streets is at an all time high and any greenland that you find is either being or will soon be ripped up and made into housing/ student accommodation/….whatever else you can think of! In terms of ‘being friendly to foreigners’ I don’t know so much. It is obvious that in our society in the UK racism is still a large factor as it is in a lot of places, but the ‘foreigners’ that I know here (kinda a lot!) All tell me that that they are happy here and like living in Coventry. There are places all around the UK… all around the world which need reconstruction. Coventry is just one of many, don’t confuse it as a hell hole when the entire world we actually live in resembles hell itself.

  • haggardfalcone

    Whoever wrote this sack of shite is obviously a ukip voting wankpuffin.

    • Relick

      yeah sure, ukip voting, despite making quite clear his politics is left wing. nice b8 m8 tho

  • Lozinger

    Could have been an interesting piece if it wasn’t peppered by factual and conceptual inaccuracies, bad grammar, sub student-union posturing, cliched rhetoric, weak attempts at satire and a strong undercurrent of bitterness presumably stemming from the authors own sense of inadequacy which as even amateur psychologists know is traditionally coupled with a baseless sense of superiority.

    Coventry here is just another canvas onto which the author has unwittingly projected his own fears regarding his own lack of social skills, imagination and dynamism. Perhaps the fictional xenophobic, dystopian Coventry of his fevered imagination – is merely a metaphor for his own bleak soul…. ba ba baaaaaaaa.

    On the plus side I did learn a new word “ostrasation” and it’s many different spellings so it wasn’t all bad.

  • ThaHatt3r

    How many times you ever been to Cov or do you just drive through quickly?
    While a lot of people are c*nts you aren’t greeted with someone gobbing at you, and although job prospects are pretty w*nk you’re sorted if you’re ok to work in a pub, which we have plenty of decent pubs around the city, but the centre is bloody packed with them! Some cracking ones at that with local live music, and is the ‘one main pub’ you talk about the Kasbah? The club that’s hosted Pete Doherty to Calvin Harris?
    ….I can’t defend the Skydome.
    Coventry is in no way some shining star, however with our motor and art museum, history in the cathedral and godiva, and host of the country’s largest free music festival, we are far from as bad as you’re trying to make out.

    Sounds like a cackle of chavs robbed your hat one time you was down for friends freshers night and you’ve not been able to let it go. Stay mad, mate.

  • guest111

    I think I’d take this article seriously if they had any grasp of grammar whatsoever.

  • Kayleigh

    I have lived in Coventry all of my life and I sorry to say you don’t know what you are on about. The olny one of your points that has any merit is that a lot of the clubs have closed over the last few years but there are other entertainment options that you didn’t mention. Perhaps before condemning a city you don’t live in you should think about the people that do live there. Coventry is my home an I (a well mannered, friendly person who has their dream job) love it, so please keep your opinion to yourself, thank you very much.

    • I empathise. I’ve lived there. It’s got its merits but I wouldn’t go as far as to call it nice. The station’s the worst. Worst place to have existing clinical depression.

  • Joe Bloggs

    You whine on about collectivism and ostracism, have you considered that as a bitter right-wing individualist, the problem maybe not with Coventry, but you being a bit of a nasty unlikable sh*t?

    • Mick Mac Ward

      this person must be a villa fan bitter and twisted !!