Melksham: It’s Grim Down South

Is Melksham, Wilshite a nice place to live

I have the misfortune of living in Melksham for most of my life, and I was genuinely surprised that it not received the honour (or dishonour!) of appearing on this list. Lying in between the equally deplorable town of Chippenham and Trowbridge, Melksham is sadly another example of how decades of decline and social issues […]

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Swindon: Britain in microcosm

Living in Swindon, Wiltshire

Swindon is Britain’s most average town. The conclusion we must draw from this is that Britain is broken, and not worth saving. Once it was proud of its huge railway works. That was closed down and some workers found alternative well-paid manufacturing jobs at Honda. That’s gone too, but never fear – a huge Amazon […]

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Chippenham – a burgeoning dystopia of morons

Living in Chippenham, Wiltshire

I grew up in “Chip-nerm”, before it exploded into its current sprawl of field-obliterating estates. It was actually quite a pleasant town, which ended at the Pheasant Pub to the west and at the cemetery/ Hardens Mead to the east. This was when Westinghouse was still going strong (I worked in the foundry), Westmead Junior […]

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Trowbridge – The Detroit of Wiltshire

Living in Trowbridge, Wiltshire

First off, let me say that Trowbridge is NOT the worst town i have visited. In fact, it is home to some of the nicest people i have ever met. This fact however, doesn’t stop the place from being a dull, dirty, dingy, depressing, dilapidated, desolate, derelict dive of a town. It needs immediate demolition […]

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Wootton Bassett… an offence to my name

Living in Royal Wootton Bassett, Swindon, Wiltshire

I was unfortunate enough to move to Wootton Bassett as a 16 year old. Don’t be fooled by the Tudor library on the high street, or the word “Royal” that has been put in front of the name of this toilet town. A few posters have already commented about the people that represent 99% of […]

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Salisbury: hole of Wiltshire

Living in Salisbury, Wiltshire, England

I have lived here for the past 17 years and have been witness to many unfortunate changes. Salisbury has always been renowned locally for being dodgy and generally **** but, in the last few years, things have really gotten worse. So much worse, in fact, that most people I know here avoid the town centre […]

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Salisbury – well there’s two types of people

Living in Salisbury, Wiltshire, South West

I have lived in Salisbury my whole life – unfortunately. If you’re looking for somewhere to make your life seem longer, then this is the place for you. The days drag on at such an unbearable rate in this dull boring little ‘city’, I already feel twice my age. You will get some people who […]

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Trowbridge – An Unpolished Turdtown

Living in Trowbridge, Wiltshire

Trowbridge – a town so bad that it led Hugh Cornwall (of Stranglers fame) to pen a song called “please don’t put me on a slow boat to Trowbridge.” Trowbridge – a town so unfortunately cruddy, it was used as the inspiration for the town of ‘Ratbridge’ in the series of children’s books, ’Here Be […]

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Salisbury: I spy with my 3rd eye

Living in Salisbury, Wiltshire

I have lived in Salisbury on and off for the last 12 years now and it becomes more and more backwards as the years roll on. Im originally from oop north and it still sends the ******* into a frenzy when they here your accent considering its a massive army town. It’s groundhog day, Royston […]

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Warminster, the hidden sh*thole of roadmen and squaddie mattresses

Living in Warminster, Wiltshire

You would think a quiet town in Wiltshire with nothing in it, nor surrounding it, would generally be a well kept, peaceful town for the elderly to await their inevitable death. However, this is far from the case in Warminster. There are perhaps four main demographics that exist in Warminster. All with their own sub […]

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Salisbury… Dear God, what a boring, depressing dump!

Living in Salisbury

Salisbury… the sort of place people emigrate from to avoid. I have recently been posted to this dump and have already applied to be transferred to anywhere but Wiltshire. The town (they call it a city because of the cathedral), trust me, it’s a big market town and full of ignorant bigoted thick Wiltshire people […]

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Warminster is a run down, dingy, dull, grey, depressing town

Living in Warminster

Warminster is an old, run down, dingy, ******, dull, grey, depressing kind of town – a lot like most of its inhabitants, but the military presence here (one of the UKs “Super Garrisons; although quite honestly there isn’t anything Super about it) give us our own unique brand of Squaddiech@vs, Anti-Squaddiechavs and Squaddieslapperch@vettes. It’s fashionable […]

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