Salisbury… Dear God, what a boring, depressing dump!

Living in Salisbury

Salisbury… the sort of place people emigrate from to avoid.

I have recently been posted to this dump and have already applied to be transferred to anywhere but Wiltshire. The town (they call it a city because of the cathedral), trust me, it’s a big market town and full of ignorant bigoted thick Wiltshire people who can’t quite grasp the fact that it’s busy because people come to see the Cathedral. For the locals, That’s the building with the tall pointy spire thingy on the top.

Otherwise it is the most boring, depressing place on God’s good earth. He must have put a cathedral here to try and save these people, but sorry God, it hasn’t worked. The pubs are dreadful, full of ******* swigging Cider whether they like it or not. The biggest conversation you will come across, and it’s certain to start a fight, are what are the ingredients in a Cornish pastie? I kid you not! The fact that it comes from Cornwall and not Wiltshire, means nothing to them.

How grim is your Postcode?

The locals have a phrase they often use round this area, “Wiltshire born Wiltshire bred, strong in the arm thick in the head” Nothing but nothing was more true. Here’s the irony… the locals are proud of it!

Do I need to say any more? I think not.