AAhh, Walsall, the brilliant chav hole of the county, where to start.
Before you step foot in this town, it is a good idea to come in via car, or better yet, just walk into town, with a friend prefarbly, because when you drive in, and leave your car for a while, the likeihood is that it would have been nicked, and is streaming its way down to M6. So thats one warning.
Next, when you have arrived in town, it is advisable if you are chav spotting to have a laugh, I advise you to do it at the new art gallery, situated at the back of Woolworths, where you’ll be able to laugh at your own delight at watching them trying to nick goods from Woolworths. They won’t step foot anywhere near the art gallery as there seems to be force-field setup to prevent chavs entering it. Or, if you fancy a pint, you can also do chav spotting at the Wharf Bar, where they won’t dare go near, because of its force-field again.
However, as the rest of the town is protected by force-fields, you’ll find them at these following tourist spots in town:
* The shopping centre, where they all round together like a big group of tossers they are at the local pound shop, to buy their goods
* The Local boop, boop, booooooop, bop, boop, boop, I’m chaving it McDonalds where they swarn the place, inside and out throwing their big macs at each other and some poor sods that walk past it
* The local tesco, which is actually known to all locals as the meeting point in town when you meet up with friends. If you have to meet friends there, don’t stand there for too long, as a fight is bound to happen there all the time, between chavs or worse yet between a chav and a goth/rocker, which can escalate into a right scene.
Where else is there, oh yes:
*The bus station, next to St Paul’s Church, where if you wanna get onto a bus to Wolverhampton, otherwise known as the chav express, i recommend you find another means of transport, as your bound to end up getting mugged at on this bus by chavs. But if you dare, you can always hop onto it and watch them nick their fake gold earrings from one another and nicking their cans of carling too.
* And finally, the night clubs in town can be a right pain in the arse, depending on where you go, the imperial is infested with them from the entry to the back wall, so thats best cleared of. The Yates is teh same, where they’ll always be a guaranteed fight at the hours of 10, 11, and midnite, so grab a seat and watch the action from the varsity bar, as they don’t really go in there nowadays.
As for the rest, the WS1 bar is a good chav free zone, as they don’t tolerate any burberry s**t, and so the chavs that don’t get entry end up having a fight with one another to keep themselves amused, while the chavettes flirt with the bouncers, attempting to gain entry to the club.
So, if your near by, pop into Walsall, and take a look around.