Everywhere in Taunton
Unfortunately, like the majority of English towns and cities, chav monkeys are everywhere in Taunton. A stroll down the pleasant streets will practically guarantee you bumping into Mr and Ms Chav, with pushchair in tow, debating whether to spend this weeks giro on scrumpy, fags, Elizabeth Duke jewellery or a night/fight in the Market House. ‘Have you got a spare fag mate’, or ‘lend us a quid mate’ or ‘watchoof**kinlookinat’ seem to be the only phrases these fine upstanding citizens seem to be able to muster towards non-chavs.
Obligatory pastimes include petty vandalism (notmyf**kincarizit), public drunkenness (in daylight hours seems to be especially encouraged) and the wearing of the chav uniform (tracksuits, cheap gold jewellery and lots of it, baseball cap, you get the picture).
At night, and especially on the weekends, Taunton turns into something more insidious, a place where gangs of spotty baseball capped youngsters further their education in chav culture by roaming the streets, intimidating local people with their cheeky behaviour, hitting unsuspecting but of course deserving solitary pedestrians (a chav is never alllowed to fight another person on their own) and amusing passerbys with their colourful language (yoof**kincurrnts)
Taunton is now on the chav map, a place where northern chavs can come on their holidays, apart from Western-Super-Mare. As my brother-in-law once said to me (and he lives in Stoke, a chav central if there ever was one), ‘they offend me by just being there’. I dont think I can sum it up better myself.