Yeovile or Yobvil as it is better known

Is Yeovil, Somerset a nice place to live

Realistically named Yeovile or Yobvil by locals, visitors can appreciate the dire state of the town centre as soon as they arrive and park in one of the tatty car parks surrounded by derelict/semi derelict buildings. Ukrainians settling here probably feel well at home as the Council’s town centre ‘Yeovil Refresh’ programme has turned it […]

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Cotford St Luke – Fantastic if you like GUNFIRE!

Living in Cotford St Luke, Somerset

Cotford St Luke is a nondescript ‘new town’ (well, 20 ish years old) 6 or so miles to the north west of Taunton. It has a Co-Op shop and a quite well reviewed diner/bar called The Chapel. The problem with this place is gunfire or gunshot, call it what you will. SIX days a week […]

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Bath – Just Because It’s Posh, Doesn’t Mean It’s Pleasant

Living in Bath, Somerset

Bath – an historic town with two universities in southwestern England. Frequented by tourists and bustling with students, you’d imagine a charming city centre, and if you look at Google images, that’s what you’ll get. But if you go to Bath, prepare to be dissapointed. Like a poorly-stocked M&S Food Hall near closing time, poshed-up […]

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Wiveliscombe: sh*te rolled down hill and collected in one glorious cesspit

Living in Wiveliscombe, Somerset

Wiveliscombe in Somerset: Well where do you start? Often described in the glossy tourist brochures (I jest – there are no glossy tourist brochures!) as ‘The Gateway to Exmoor, nestling in an amphitheatre of glorious surrounding hills’. Instead what we find is that all that collective sh*te from those glorious surrounding hills (and by heck […]

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Nailsea: Where the old come to die

Living in Nailsea, Somerset

I’ve lived in Nailsea most of my life and like everyone else below the age of 20, can’t wait to get hell out of the place. In the last 5 years they’ve bit more old folks homes than actual houses so walking the streets makes you think you’ve wandered onto the set for the next […]

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Frome: Trapped in Vegan Hell

Living in Frome, Somerset

Frome used to be a cute place to visit years ago. Not now. Now it’s been ******** with Londoners and their feral children. Everywhere you go you will smell them. One of the worst things is the monthly “market” where people lose all ability to drive and park for one day. They will park on […]

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“I hate life and Watchet” – said a poignant piece of graffiti

Living in Watchet, Somerset

“I hate life & Watchet” was some especially poignant graffiti I saw carved into the bus stop. It pretty much sums things up really. Although I never actually lived there, I visited Watchet pretty much 5 days a week to score [“A sh*t ton of illicit substances” -Ed] back in the mid-late 90’s for about […]

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Glastonbury: it’s hard to find anyone who isn’t blowing shamanic smoke up their own ****

Living in Glastonbury

Glastonbury is not just a festival. It’s a town in its own right. In fact, the locals (who funnily enough actually moved here from London 20 years ago) will happily tell you in their annual moan that it Glastonbury Festival is ACTUALLY Pilton Pop Festival – Pilton being a small village 5 miles east of […]

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Bristol: A battle between hipster and yokel

Living in Bristol

Bristolians are often derided for their farmer-come-pirate accents, and have never been though of as the classiest of folks. This is probably due to their lack of class. However, something has happened to Bristol over the past 10 years or so. Coffee shops, micro-breweries and organic food stores are springing up everywhere, ‘hipsters’ are filling […]

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Wells – Posh veneer, with a hidden underbelly

Living in Wells, Somerset

Ah, Wells. Lying at the foot of the Mendip hills its the smallest city in England and the gateway to the Somerset levels. Sounds lovely, right? Well, some of it is. There is a nice old cathedral that drags in hordes of noisy French students every summer, and there is also the Bishops Palace with […]

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Yeovil, Chavtopia ten years later- the final chavter

Living in Yeovil

Roughly ten years ago, I wrote what the local rag called a “scathing review” on Yeovil, Jewel of the **** crown. To my utter bewilderment, this recently resurfaced and was the subject of heated debate. Obviously, it was a very slow news day. What gave me particular joy was the glee with which lots of […]

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Minehead, Grockels come to here to paddle their hairy toes in the sea

Living in Minehead, Somerset

A picturesque town on the north Somerset coast, in the middle of lots of picturesque villages and beaches. Not many shops but if you are brave, Taunton is only 22 miles down the road. Lovely setting, tranquil beaches,…sounds great, right? Wrong. The masses from Birmingham, Liverpool and Cardiff seem to wish to make it their […]

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