Southampton Swaythling.

Bloody hell it feels like the number of ***** grows by the hour in Southampton.  Obviously those so far down the evolutioary scale can’t control their disgusting rutting urges to copulate  frequently with their cousins/ sisters/ mums or whatever.

There are small yorkshire terriers that can refrain from dry humping longer than the 14 year old in the shanty house next door.

The way I see it Southampton ***** have only got 4 goals in life:

How grim is your Postcode?

1.  To cram as much KFC, McDonalds, Burger King and Bensons down their ratty necks as possible – paid for by either robbing you or the old widower down the street or from the free handouts because they can’t/ can’t be arsed to work.

2.  Trying to finger your daughter after class and chatting her up by calling her a “*****” or “****.”

3.  Burning out every bin in a 300 mile radius often with the aid  of propellants.

4.  Producing more foul mouthed, obnoxious little brats paid for by you know who.  Seriously any couples who are unfortunate to have fertility problems should just don fake burberry and lacoste trackie bottoms and hang out outside one -stop on Burgess Road.  There are frogs that have fewer descendants than these *****.

A little while ago I used to live on Harrison Road in Swaythling.  One evening I was returning home at about 6.30 to overhear the local **** “momma” shout out to her small children “Oi you *******, put down that ******* dead rat and come and get your ******* diiinnneer!”

Jesus christ.  Anyway the asking price of a house on Harrison Road is c.£200k!!!!!!!  I kid you not.

At work we’ve got some cleaners who are real *******.  The cleaning cupboard has been dubbed the Mutant’s Cave for obvious reasons.

They will nick anything not nailed down and sone stuff that is.  Mugs, pens (I’m not sure they can actually write but there you go), paper etc.

There has  been cases of the **** kids invading the site and going on a nicking spree.  But once they get in its as if their brains cease functioning and they just steal the first thing they can find.  Definitely the **********.

In Portswood Safeway I’ve recently seen a woman in dirty pink dressing gown – with crusty ***** stain -, no shoes and a *** buying economy beans and 40 B&H.  Now I know its time to leave.