Maidenhead: Not fit for a Royal wedding!
I woke one morning in Maidenhead, looked out the window and thought ‘oh my god, I have completely failed in life’.
Woking: good train links to London apart from that it’s a sh*thole
Avoid Woking, visit Guildford, Camberley or Farnham instead or else some pink haired chav might mug you.
The sting in the wonder tale of Forest Row in Sussex
There's a population in this Forest Row - small but vociferous (kind of terrier-like) opinionated, arrogant, smug - that needs to be avoided at all cost.
Haywards Heath – the patio of England
Haywards Heath is a characterless, noisy, nightmare. It is a swindle-hole full of rot, with not a scrap of Heath land in sight.
Hailsham… Town of the ‘wannabe’
Towns near Hailsham are similar. The people don't know how lucky they are to have grown up in an area with no guns and clean air.