Manor, Sheffield

So where do i start with the Manor. An area that has already got a reputation for Chavsters up and down the land.

The reason for this is the Traffic Cops programme on BBC1 which whenever it was wants to show an example of a hair-raising car chase, or the consequences of car crime then it always begins the clip with the words ‘meanwhile back on the manor estate’. The manor estate has a more advanced type of ******** in it;s midst, they think why bother with buying a clapped out heap of scrap and spend their dole/social security money doing one up when it’s simple. JUST NICK ONE.

It’s gets better than that though, to enhance ******** status in 2000 it laid claim to having a 12 year old pregnant girl in it’s midst, i’m pretty sure i saw the said girl and offspring the other day in the chapel of worship known as Maccy D’s when i saw a girl not much older than 16 screeching some instructions at a junior ********. I couldn’t decipher it although it sounded something like “fookinleavethilickesistaalooneasthiduntwantchipahllovaem”.

How grim is your Postcode?

The ******** doesn’t shop in Manor, why when they have got Medahall or Tahn in easy striking distance on Supertram, which comes for free with the excuse “avelostmifare”. Magical words indeed. It also has the added benefit of the Social in the opposite direction. Ideal for fraudulent benefit claims and crisis loans.

For the unitiated Medahall is also known as Meadowhall and is a large and expensive shopping centre which has a lot of expensive shops which enable the ******** plenty of shoplifting opportunities. For the more affulent ******** it has the holy trimuvate of Argos, Sport Soccer and Maccy D’s. In fact it has a whole food court where the ******** can eat Big Mac’s all day long. It also has a non-smoking ban which mean **** can annoy the security people every day by smoking till their hearts content. The non-smoking area is by every exit door which also affords them the opportuity of questioning smokers along the line of ‘gissafagmate” or gissafagluv”.

The true mark of the ******** is having the crisis of having a boyfriend in ‘Doncatraz’, a witty name for the nearest prison. The **** will have had early contact with ‘Doncatraz’ as it also homes a young offenders unit housed there meaning the ******** will have little difficulty in locating said place after their inital visit as their boyfriend will merely upgrade to the other block.

Come to the Manor and spot

-Badly dressed girls pushing terrorprams.
-Young children whose first words are swear words
-Burnt out cars
-And Burberry galore

You know you want to!