So it sucks. It really sucks. You’re walking through town looking for a new (none chavvy) pair of trainers, or a new pair of jeans (can someone please introduce jeans to chavs, at least they look good on everyone, where are white trackies, well, not many people can pull of that look). Anyway, your shopping in town and you go into any slightly, shall we say, cheaper, shop, and guess what you find… chav familys galore, with all their chav babies (and of these there are a lot), their chav inbred brothers, aunts, grandparents (seriously, old chavs are even worse), and so on, all with their benefits money (just got that morning, so won’t be much left by tuesday), and buying, no, pretending to be about to buy a new trackie, trainers, HUGE earings the size of their head, or a f*** off you idiot t-shirt. Yes, it’s GRavesend, though i wish it were graves(of)chavs, or chavsend.
Don’t go to gravesend. I don’t care if you really need to get to the hospital, or really want to go into pound stop to see that phenomenon that is a chav gathering, don’t go. Seriously, you really shouldn’t.
They have even started beating up goths and emo’s, those before feared people with their black make up and scary clothes ( i acctually don’t mind goths, and emos are better than chavs any day). No, before a chav would never go near a goth, and would just abuse from a distance. But now, go to emo havens such as leos ( a night club at the Red Lion pub), and you will find a number of emo’s getting beaten up by chavs.
Yes, it is great. Also, don’t go to macdonalds, any shop that refers to cheap prices in it’s name (so 99p store, pound store, price cutter etc.) don’t go to any lifts, escalators, sports shops, or any where that is within a two mile radius of gravesend. And as for bluewater – i thought it was meant to be posh, but no, it is now the playground of drunk, and drugged chavs who have been pushed out of gravesend by their inbred, slightly ‘arder’ cousins, or whatever.
No, go to gravesend any time pefore the apocolypse, and you will come back via a&e, or by being punched all the way home, because i wouldn’t count on the police saving you, no, i haven’t seen a police car anywhere near kings farm for a long time.
Oh, and if you must come to gravesend, please stop by the estate agents and buy my house, because it’s far to close to chavs for comfort (anywhere in the uk is too close, )but hay, on the bright side, i’m still hoping for a chav’s only, day after tomorrow style end to it all.