Crawley, West Sussex (as if there’s another…)

South EastWest Sussex

OK, someone asked me on a list a few days back why I hated living in Crawley, so I thought I’d publish it here:

After putting up with them for years, I’m making a stand against “townies”* and their apathy, I’ll start next month sometime, probably… :p

It’s a subject that’s close to my heart, I just hate seeing a girl of about 15/16 yelling at her son, a toddler of about 2/3, “Nike, Fakking Come’ere before I have to slap ya” (sadly a true story!).

One, that’s no way totalk to a kid, Two, it’s cruel naming them after designer makes, Three,it’s offensive language in a public place (something I was nearly arrested for during one of the demos I’ve been on).

*A townie is the same as a C**v and a Kev, i.e. the girls wear 3/4 length tracksuit bottoms, push prams aged 14 or under, have huge hooped earings and a wide range of vocabulary as long as the sentence starts with “F**K” or a variant thereof. They also have a tendency to stand outside McDonald’s, letting their pregnancies hang out over the top ofthe aforementioned tracksuit bottoms and just below the bottom of the crop top. The blokes are obsessed with sexual conquests, playing “Lets see how quickly we can put each other in Hospital” and modifying their beaten up cars by blacking out the windows, mounting neon tubes underneath the car, driving at top speed around the town centre listening to Hip-Hop in the hope that they will become “black” overnight. Both genders exaggerate what they have done, frequently lie about who they’ve slept with, name their kids after designer clothing and scream abuse at each other whilst not giving a toss about anyone else.They epitomise everything I hate about Crawley.

Top 10 worst places to live in England 2019