Bad news from the southampton front

HampshireSouth East

Friends, fellow opposers of the c**v, I bring you awful tidings for I
fear that this city may be nearly lost. The c***s are now so numerous
that through the city centre and Shirley they appear to equal in number
to, if not in fact outnumbering, other members of the population;
further to that the vast majority of non-c***s are either elderly or
university students, as the former depart this world and the latter
stop coming here because of the city’s infestation we must be prepared
for the c***s to assume overall control.

I hear that the line has now broken at Netley and that peaceful
picturesque village is suffering the scourge. They have been sighted
there climbing among the ruins of the abbey and desecrating that
ancient place, what is worse is that there now remains no natural line
of defence between them and the Hamble so before long they may swamp
Bursledon and Hamble Le-Rice. Disturbingly it seems that an undercover
element of the c**v movement has begun to dress like yachtsmen in
offshore waterproofs and even Dubarry boots, this can only be so that
they are able to safely infiltrate the area and expand their numbers

Swaythling has never been the best of places but is now, I hear, only
sustained as a viable space for humanity to exist by its transient
student population while up the road in Portswood the c**v is on the
rise. One good piece of news I suppose is that the chances of c***s
ever entering higher education are truly remote, but should the city
rely on its students rather than permanent residents to maintain its

The time may be coming when an ordered withdrawal from the city of
Southampton is made necessary, sacrificing it for the good of the
country as a whole as we move to new fronts in the battle of our age.
Alas, poor Southampton which has stood so strong through years of war
and peace that it should fall like this.

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