Written by Anonymous. Posted in Uncategorised

Sonic did a good description of the chavs in my hometown but I think a further continuation is required…

There are 2 distinct breeds of chav in St Neots, these are…

– Pedigree ‘Laahhhndaahhhnnn’ chavs. These tend to reside in the area known as the Sandfields Estate and are the result of many years of cohabitation between generations of London Overspill families who began their migration to St Neots in the 1960s and never looked back. ‘Laahhhndaahhhnnn’ chavs can be spotted either in their primitive dwellings on streets such as Duck Lane and Whitehall Walk or visiting their favourite watering holes. For recreation these chavs enjoy hurtling around public open areas on Mopeds or meeting at their own personal conference centres, any bus stop will suffice.

– Classy chavs. These tend to be scattered around the nearby villages of Eaton Ford, Eaton Socon and Staploe and are usually St Neots bred. Amongst this breed can be found a number of spoilt 11 year old chavs-to-be who for now must settle with skateboarding outside the United Reformed Church, wearing ‘hoodies’ and pretending to be ‘gangstas’. Older members of this group dress up in all their golden finery with the compulsury Louis Vutton handbag and/or ‘genuine’ Burberry hat and scarf, jump into their neat yet souped up Nissan Micras and drive to ‘The Priory’ where they can bop the night away and possibly pull a person of similar social stature and inclination.

When guest chavs from the neighbouring town of Huntingdon come to visit for the weekend, it really makes me wonder why anyone would ever live here. But it’s a haven for chav spotters, so come on over, the chavs are ‘lovely’!

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