Plymouth, ingrate central

Living in Plymouth, Devon and Cornwall
Living in Plymouth, Devon and Cornwall

Plymouth, ingrate central

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Plymouth, when people hear this name they instantly think of green and a lighthouse, Unfortunately this is not the case, the city is full of uneducated ingrates who struggle to spell their own name. Meeting someone who was born Plymouth or Cornwall who has an IQ score of more than 60 is a rare pleasure, one I have experienced probably twice in the last 27 years.

The city is on the border of Cornwall another place people who have never been to this cesspit seem to think is wonderful. Cornwall is mainly full of simpletons, 6 fingered weirdos and wannabe Londoners. Let’s move on to some detailed run downs of certain areas of Plymouth.

Crownhill

On the day of writing this there was an article in what I refer to as the ‘Bullshit Daily’ but is really known as the Plymouth Live that a house had been set alight by lightning. This is strange in that area. You would more expect a house to be set on fire because someone forgot to pay their friendly neighbourhood drug dealer. Crownhill is full of ne’er-do-wells who generally hang around the Morshead Road coop or the Crownhill Village car park. This area generally stinks of Cannabis and in the main village which is a road that is 150 yards long there is 3 pubs. Another attraction in this area is the Plumer Road subway, this site is religiously used for the dealing and to taunt defenceless pensioners who are on their way to farmfoods.

Derriford

Full of snobs who still have the audacity to walk around in their pyjamas in broad daylight and then look down their nose at you for not wearing a suit or driving a 10 year old Mondeo. Get a grip of yourself love, you’ve got 4 kids all by different men, you live in a Council House and claim benefits. Don’t look down your nose at me just because you live in Derriford, people like me fund your benefits!

Devonport

Devonport is another area renowned for ingrates. In this area it’s not even the druggies that’s the worst. The [alleged] fact is that it has the highest muggings rate by far in the city. Some residents would quite happily scalp you if dandruff had a going rate, purely so they can’t get a different kind of white powder. This area also has the [alleged] highest rate of knife crime in this city. On a whole don’t walk through this area without your pockets padlocked, a stab vest, a balaclava and a [imaginary] baseball bat for self defence.

Prince Rock

Oh my god, Prince Rock! Situated along the Embankment full of single mothers who uses their benefits to purchase fosters and gigolo’s. The social houses in this area are fairly well kept and it’s a shame who they let live in them. This is the kind of area where you could [allegedly] buy a newborn baby for a packet of 10 Lambert and Butler and 50p.

Stoke

Finally we come to Stoke, a fairly civilised area but being stuck smack bang between Ford, Devonport and Stonehouse, the many unsavoury characters are bound to pass through this area throwing house bricks through windows, taunting residence, kicking dogs and keying cars. All goes well in this area until the final orders at the [pub we can’t mention by name] and then all hell is let loose. I was once passing through this area at 1am and witnessed a man kicking the sh*t out of…. A lamppost, shouting at it? Who knows why, probably because it’s the only thing he’s ever got a chance of marrying.

Out of 250,000 residents, in my view I’d say 249,250 of these residents are uneducated, gene-pool-limiting simpletons, who are unable to spell their own name.


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