Posted by & filed under Buckinghamshire, South East, United Kingdom.

Full of smug, self-satisfied yummy-mummies and the stockbrokers who keep them, alongside ancient crumblies who clog the pavements walking 3 astride at 1mph.

On the weekend it acts as a haven for the High Wycombe catchment area, attracting aspirational lady diners and bar-goers in search of their very own stockbroker. Inevitably this attracts cynical gentlemen diners who disguise themselves as stockbrokers, a subterfuge which collapses after their second Stella and they revert to the oikish twats they really are.

Virtually nothing in the way of original live music – pretty much all local bands play covers of music which may not be newer than the 80s. They had a live drum and bass band here in 1998 which stretched Wycombe A+E to the extent it had to close.

The odd exception for a small acoustic duo who play reasonably up to date music on guitar (actually rather good). But innovation is actively frowned upon.

Generally the most excitement is generated when a new restaurant opens, particularly when it serves exactly the same fare as another nearby restaurant, but at 50% higher prices. The arrival of the Giggling Squid was heralded as something akin to the opening of the South Bucks branch of the Barbican, and the reopening of the Crown by Tom Kerridge has been met to breathless, gushing publicity unseen since the announcement of CrossRail.

The car parks, bus lanes and streets are clogged with Chelsea tractors, particularly in the mid-late afternoon when the yummy-mummies are transporting their little darlings to and from school and/or Peppa Pig shows at the Slug and Lettuce. Public transport is risible, with a 30 minute journey from Maidenhead by train (a distance of 4 miles), or an equally long bus ride in either direction. A taxi fare costs £2-3 a mile.

Neighbouring Marlow are various council estates, only catered to by the Cross Keys, leaving a vast cultural gulf between the ciabatta-munching, Barbour-jacket toting haves and the remaining have-nots. The only form of cultural interplay outside of the very friendly O’Donohues weekly Open Mic session is the sport of comparing jewellery and sports jackets.

In short, a shiny, spotless jewel concealing a rotten underside of derivatives traders, smug women who are obsessed with useless trinkets and overpriced shoes in a merry-go-round of lifestyle retail businesses, and wide boys who aspire and/or pretend to be part of this milieu. I intend to leave as soon as possible.

Posted by & filed under Hampshire, South East, United Kingdom.

Ah Thornhill, well known as being the laughing stock of Southampton – and that in itself is a real insult on its own. It isn’t one of the nicer places on God’s green earth and could be described as the place God forgot.

With Thornhill Youth Centre being a particular hub for fights and the occasional dogging session, it’s not hard to see why you wouldn’t want your children to grow up here.

The majority of the female population have more kids than teeth. Many houses are devoid of double-glazing and some have been as inventive as to put some lidl’s own cling film to stop that leaking!

So it’s not all bad- thornhillians can be seen as being fairly resourceful. So there is still some hope for the people of thornhill- and that hope is that the council knock thornhill down and deport the residents to somewhere nicer; I hear Somalia is lovely this time of year

Posted by & filed under Greater Manchester, North West, United Kingdom.

Radcliffe is a small village in North Manchester and is quickly turning into a ghetto all it needs is some tower blocks and it would look like the rest of Manchester. If you came here you would think its a nice posh place to relax and chill but as you go deeper into the town to the council estates and the poorer bits you realise how much of a s**thole this place is!

The main reason I think its turning bad is because Salford has become such a bad place people move away to a place they think is a ‘nice area’ which Radcliffe’s rep has been for years now and all these people start doing crimes here and a bunch of s**t basically Radcliffe is turning into Salford I wouldn’t be surprised if it ended up worse. I aint just gonna slag it off it is a beautiful place in some parts but in the poorer ‘working class’ part its just your average manc ghetto slum. More dealers / shoplifters / gangstas coming in day by day its madness. It doesn’t affect me really because I grew up in Salford so I know what its like to live in a ‘deprived’ area!

I aint gonna show my self up and say I’m from the ‘hood’ that’s just straight up goonish. Most kids are skippin school and are out on there ‘graft’ which is basically slang for stealing / drug dealing you know stuff like that. I wouldn’t be surprised if I started eventually because everyone needs money at some point. The kids just stare at you and if you even try to speak to them they say ” where are u from ” and pull out a knife or some sort of weapon!

Well…..that was abit over exaggerated not every kid but the ‘hoodlum’ kids anyway the ones that want a rep and s**t. I do believe this is one of the worst places or….will eventually become one of the worst places in Manchester don’t know about the whole of the UK I’ve seen some baddd places. *DON’T* say its not unless you live in the more deprived places of Radcliffe and not a 4bedroom house because all the snobby posh peeps know nuttin unless their street wise which *most* are not! If you think its nice, I beg you to spend a night in one of the poorer parts of Radcliffe and see if you have the same opinion. I am *NOT* slagging of Raddyyy at all I’m just saying it is really bad at times. Thanks for your time! Peace outtttt!

Posted by & filed under East Sussex, Kent, London, South East.

It’s easy to see why Hastings is held in such low regard by both residents and non-residents alike. All the indicators are there in the statistics to show how poor this end-of-the-line run down seaside town is, compared to the rest of the South East. It has 27.2% of its residents in private rented accommodation compared the the average in England of 15.4%. It has the lowest average weekly take home pay in the South East. Despite the obvious, there are other factors that make a town and that’s the people who live there. For such an impoverished area, Hastings has a vibrant culture. However, this is often dismissed by a lot of residents and those who’ve ‘made it out of the ghetto’ as they have often become blinkered to the reality of most of the towns in the South East (by choice or ignorance) and become fixated on Brighton and London as some promised land. The grass is always greener until your rent triples or quadruples and your salary doesn’t.

For me what makes a good town, is a fine balance between money and culture. To put it bluntly, if artists cannot afford to live in the town because the rich have driven them out, then it’s finished. Hastings needs more money and inward investment, not just investment class landlords and corporations sucking every last penny out of the place. However, artists can afford to live here and that’s why you have articles describing Hastings as Dalston-on-sea and the Shoreditch of Sussex. Brighton is cutting a fine balance but money seems to be winning out, so look for the certain cultural exodus that will follow in the next 5 years. London, I mean real London (Zones 1 & 2), has been conquered by money for two decades. What passes for culture these days are merchant bankers, oligarchs and sheiks plus their model trophy wives, picking at £250 main courses in restaurants where most people could not afford the bottled water. A sterile, culturally cleansed playground for the mega-rich, where artists day trip in from 60 miles away.

So what are the five towns in the South East that are worse than Hastings? Well life does exist outside the golden triangle of H-town, Brighton and London but some of it, you should not bother visiting or living in;

5. Bexhill-on-sea

It maybe the birth place of motor racing, but it seems everyone under the age of 65 has used their motor vehicle to leave the place. Eastbourne just along the coast, has been described as ‘God’s waiting room’, well Bexhill is the place for those who can’t afford a seat in the grim reaper’s departure lounge and are loitering outside.

4. Royal Tunbridge Wells

A town entirely consisting of Reginald Perrins and retired Reginald Perrins in what is a London commuter dormitory. The rents are some of the highest outside London and Brighton for what is a decidedly mediocre if not moneyed town. If there is any culture, it gets turned off at 10pm before some meddlesome ratbag complains to the local environmental health department.

3. Sheerness

Like Hastings, Sheerness-on-sea is piss poor. Where the residents of Hastings make the town, the residents of Sheerness break it. A town so culturally moribund, there is no place like it in the south east. Neglected by Swale Borough Council like a ginger haired step child, Sheerness is the Clacton of Kent. The now defunct website ‘Sheppey Scum’ used to have a page for culture, that just said ‘No’.

2. Cranbrook

Your typical high weald market town with money and what I can only describe as ‘nice’. The kind of place where the investment class slum landlords of Hastings live and send their kids to public schools like Benenden. All the aspiring AB1’s in Hastings and Rother, who would vote in a pig if it had a blue rosette on it, want to live there in semi-rural tranquillised mediocrity because the local comprehensive (their single buy-to-let hole in Hastings, doesn’t bring in enough to send their spawn to private school) has great ofsted stats.

1. Gravesend

Ah the festering cat turd in the Garden of England. Those who would swap 1066 country for Gravesham, have truly lost the plot. Other North Kent holes worse than Hastings are available, with a honorary mentions for Chatham, Gillingham, Strood and Sittingbourne. Yes kids, Hastings is bad, but it isn’t Medway.

OK, now you’ve seen the list and disagreed, give me your bile!

Posted by & filed under London, West London.

I am old and ready to die, i read with some alarm the comments made here about our green and pleasant land, living in covent garden for a very long time i can rant with authority, be careful the drugs, prostitutes [ from parker street ]…gangs, violent drunks, culture clashes , lack of police resources, thieves , and those out for “a night up west” have made the place a venal skank pit, worthy of a sheet of continuous napalm.

Need a piss or a turnout go to parker street, just defecate at will outside secrets or parkers, every one else does, buy fake drugs from any of the pirate cab drivers, or take a “trike” with blaring eastern european pop music from the 90’s, the trike drivers will ask you for a hundred sobs for the shortest of journeys, when you say no they will say just “making the joke my friend only £50 to you and i forget the V.A.T.”

Roaming gangs of shaved apes go on way into the night looking for any one or anything to smash up the need to prove themselves is overwhelming, so come on up, get you mobile nicked, your car robbed, your face slashed, your girl raped, in the last 12 months we have had the lot, including a jumper who committed suicide about 8am after a fair size crowd had gathered.

Official stats say the ward of convent garden and holborn has more licensed premises per sq metre than any were else in the U.K. and the highest crime rate in the borough of camden [ that includes camden high street which is no day at the beach itself] what was an area for artists , artisans , writers , musicians, thinkers etc, has become the go to place for the scum feeders dredging the bottom of the sewer sucking down the human waste into their filthy bile infested corpus, gargling the lot with a cheap larger and a kebab from a place with a rat problem to rival any dock in the world.

So well down camden council, you took some thing good and turned it into just another play ground for the dumb and dirty,,,,,,thank god ill be taking a dirt nap soon enuf,,,its all yours suckers…..