Colchester, omg innt whateva geez, we iz fik!

Dunces, d*ckheads, dilapidation and dives- ooh and a lot of dogs!!

What a town, wish I never moved here. The town is rewarded with emptying shops, empty bus depots, dangerously uneven pavements and an embarrassment of a Saturday town market. WTF is the green signed posh shop w and g – take a look – what a crock. My weekend highlight is going up and down chains stores escalators. TKM is an indoor jumble sale so is an apposing clothes shop. Superbly managed and very green castle park but i reckon over time even the orange twats of colchester will change this.

Intelligence is in the form of a bit of chewing gum stuck to your shoe, seriously durr innit bruv. we are fick. We cannot drive nor can we speak or spell, what does manners mean? We aint got none ere innit omg whateva. Driving in this town is absolute bollox. drivers cannot drive for sure, don’t know how to indicate, steer and WTF do you do at a round about – go on try it you orange fikkos. Appalling is being generous. Speaking of generous, that is what the council tax is for, a lazy burger munching police force, uneven pavements, pot holes and unreadable road signs. I can go on but I wont.

Oh ok walking three abreast on a narrow pavement and not moving over? You know who you are d*ck heads.

It’s a crying shame as there are signs of improvement, but I fear this is too little too late or will be destroyed by the total chavness of Colchester, Tickets please 1 way outta ere innit.

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