Blackbird Leys, Oxford is a Haven for the Underclass

Living in Blackbird Leys, Oxford

This is my views on Blackbird Leys in Oxford.

I went here once on a Tuesday afternoon in 2014 to see what it was like. Never again. I felt sick when walking around and would rather move to Uzbekistan than spend more than 10 minutes in this dump. The Estate is beyond repair and is more depressing than working on a Sunday in a carpet shop

The grass verges are filled with soiled nappies, empty vodka bottles and ‘used’ copies of Nuts. Whilst I was there I walked past about five **** families, who all who had far too many (presumably) unwanted kids. They all wore what was presumably fake Argos bling in an attempt to vaguely presently to the public and the in-laws. One guy did walk past in a suit though, which was from George at Asda, which he had bought for his job interview at the local off-licence.

How grim is your Postcode?

On one road I think I saw a carjacking taking place. Their used to that kind of thing on the Estate, so one wouldn’t be surprised that no one even batted an eyelid. However they gave up after 20 seconds, probably because it was an ****-up Nissan Sunny and therefore was not worth stealing. They then took off on their stolen mini-motos, only to be stopped by the police. The police [allegedly] then got a backie off them. ‘If you can’t **** ’em, eh?’

The alleyways are poorly lit, and are covered in blood, presumably from the 5 phone muggings that happen every week. They also stink of weed.

There are old toilets and kitchen appliances on every street. I even saw a man sitting one one toilet. He looked at me with an evil stare; ‘what are you looking at matey, have you never seen a man taking a dump before?’ He then took out his key and went into his house.

The bus shelter is home to local homeless celebrity Mr Mann. His hobbies include bus economics, studying bus religions, bus politics and reading bus literature. He is always up to a nice chat, so long as it involves talks about buses.

The swimming pool is the only decent part of the whole Estate. Though the absence of water does rather let the whole thing down.