I visited Great Yarmouth several times recently and hope never to have to return. Where the bleak, brown, hostile sea stops, bleak, hostile depressing streets start, with grim “amusement” arcades on the dilapidated front where it is impossible to imagine deriving any joy or amusement.
The star attraction
The star attraction it seems is a chip shop bang in the centre square which is famous for its…er…chips and you can see depressing white trash society at its most feckless and gormless, feeding the seagulls and pigeons. Actually there seem to be a disproportionate amount of chippers in GY, presumably to provide a staple diet for its ******** inhabitants and for the waves of other obese ****** mutants who seem to descend on the place for some unfathomable reason (perhaps their white trash hell hole towns are even worse) but that seems unfeasible.
Nothing of Beauty
There is absolutely nothing of beauty in this irretrievable dump. No charm, no respite from the endless social and architectural grimness. We made the mistake of wandering along the streets into a different area which I believe the locals call Baghdad (?) where suddenly you realise that you are in not only a different area of the town but several different countries. Haggard, dodgy looking young guys with face tattoos on BMXs go round doing dope deals quite openly, nobody speaks English in the shops, the doorways are full of trash and excrement, the streets smell of urine and the buildings are extra-extra dilapidated and shabby.
Weird people stagger about or stare at you from alcoves. People shriek and holler in alien dialects from behind first floor blinded dirty windows in crumbling terraced houses. Drunks and junkies slump and stagger. We got the hell out of there back to the safety of Ch4v-central square, where we were able to observe the locals in their shell suits with their pasty unhealthy complexions and yellow teeth snarling at each other, each and every one glued to their phones.
Datyime drinking seems to be the norm here, even early in the morning Wetherspoons was packed with shrieking yokels necking pints and stuffing food down their fat throats. Unbelievable. This place could advertise itself as a museum of damaged, unemployable ch4vs, yobs, fatties, nutters and mutants. Zero culture, zero charm, zero hope of any kind of salvation.
Downham Market: from ex-cons in the flats by the train tracks to the Retreat Estate
Thetford – An optimists guide
Cromer, supposedly known as ‘Gem of the North Norfolk coast’ – why?
King’s Lynn: a once prestigious gem reduced to a ********** ground
Hunstanton – don’t waste your time
Come to Weeting, we have a steam festival and that’s about it
Diss, at least it sounds like a nice place
Thetford is very, very scary