Blackpool: The seaside hole of littered beaches and benefit bums

Living in Blackpool, Lancashire

There are so many wonderful things in Blackpool. The littered beaches, the adorable little orchin children, and the peculiar smell of fish from the council flat round the corner. People say you learn from your mistakes, but if that were true Blackpool wouldn’t have a population.

Want to lighten your load? Well visit Blackpool, where some ner’do’well benefits bum can alleviate you of your car keys, wallet, phone and shoes. There is also a variety of culture, not to mention the homeless magician on the corner and Blackpool’s upcoming grime ‘artists’. And by grime, I mean screaming threats down an iPhone.

As well as culture, when you visit Blackpool, you get the privilege of witnessing an evolution of 21st century. Some may say that familial relations is done out of some feeling of love, but actually, it is done for the variety of benefits you get for caring for a special needs ‘human’ child. These benefits will be spent on a variety of things such as Store brand vodka, cheap ****** and a night at the council flat brothel. This leaves just enough benefits money for a tin of beans.

How grim is your Postcode?

So if you want a cheap, drug and STD filled holiday, visit Blackpool today!