Recently, I typed the term ‘Blackpool s**m’ into Google and found an excellent article on this site. Whilst very true, I have become so disillusioned with Blackpool over the years that I thought I would add my thoughts.
Yes, the title of my article may come across as a little harsh but really, this place truly is the inbreeding capital of Britain. This is no thanks to the sheer numbers of s**m coming in from the rest of Britain to be with other like-minded s**m. What is most horrifying about Blackpool s**m is that it knows it is s**m, takes great pleasure in being s**m and has absolutely no desire to be anything other than s**m. The s**m epidemic is hitting the whole of Britain but Blackpool is it’s absolute epicentre.
I was lucky to be born into a wealthy family and spent many of my formative years on the second most expensive street in Fleetwood, just a few short minutes away from Blackpool. I have also been lucky enough to have lived in other places but unfortunately, due to having family in the area, have always ended up returning, always finding it worse than when I returned the time before. I always knew Blackpool was a bit rough and ready and on visiting for whatever reason, I was often made fun of for being ‘posh’ and whatever else. However, I don’t remember it being as bad as it is now.
Just walking around the town centre and seeing the result of years of inbreeding is an ordeal, so much so that we try to avoid the place unless absolutely necessary. I have had several horrendous jobs in Blackpool, all of which have been ruined by those from the shallow end of the gene pool. This is because s**m has an obsession with attempting to shaft anybody who isn’t s**m. If you are not s**m and have an education in Blackpool (I have a First Class Honours Degree in English Literature), the ‘sewer class’ as we refer to it does not understand you. The sewer class is a completely different species with very different genetics.
The sewer class of Blackpool is a result of a rampant attitude towards sex and years of inbreeding, reducing the size of the gene pool. It exists in the underbelly of society and relishes in doing so. S**m has carved out a new class beneath the working class, which it has effectively already wiped out. S**m poses a very real threat to the likes of you and I: The middle classes and upper classes. Due to it’s jealousy at once being the underclass, it is now revolting, purging it’s dastardly plan to rid England of the Old Guard. It meets in the roughest parts of town plotting the demise of every moral and value that the Old Guard holds, striking at every opportunity, usually in large groups acting towards an individual. S**m finds strength in numbers and due to the dwindling numbers of the Old Guard, this can have a nightmarish effect, undermining the individual and giving s**m the dominance it wants. Blackpool s**m has an obsession with the internet, particularly social networking and can often be seen taking selfies and indulging in one of its favourite past-times: cyber-bullying. Where as you and I may find the internet useful for learning purposes or other constructive reasons, due to it’s very limited number of brain cells and plan to take over the world, s**m sees it as an opportunity to wipe out the Old Guard. It has now become so dominant in Blackpool that it has taken the idea of cyber-bullying and now does it directly to your face.
Blackpool s**m,and s**m across the entire United Kingdom, can be differentiated from you and I by a number of methods. Some of these are:
1. Weight: S**m is usually always fatter than the Old Guard. However, due to drug use, another favourite past-time of the sewer class, it can also display the bony, ravaged characteristics of an addict.
2. Disfigurement: S**m has a different skeleton. Note the sometimes stooped nature of its walk and the exaggerated gate of male s**m, an attempt to make itself look bigger than it actually is. This is animalistic and based upon animals such as the bulldog. On this note, s**m often keeps intimidating breeds of dog in an attempt to mark its territory.
3. The Piggy Gene: Note the increase in numbers of people who look like pigs in Blackpool. This is as a result of years of inbreeding.
4. Disability: S**m will often either have a disability due to the ever decreasing size of the gene pool. It also has the ability to feign other disabilities in order to gain benefits.
5. Voice: S**m has the inability to speak in cohesive sentences and cannot hold a normal conversation, instead being dependent on strings of utterances and insults towards non-s**m. It speaks in what appears to you and I an exaggerated regional dialect but it is actually a different language.
6. Other methods of s**m communication: S**m uses telepathy between themselves in order to aid its attempts to bring down non-s**m. Note facial expressions such as a narrowing of the eyes and looks of evil as it plots your demise. It will often say things to you like “You’re too nice, you are”, a sign that it is about to launch its attack.
7. Influence of television and the media: Television and other media such as newspapers now caters to the sewer class. Note the deterioration in standards in these forms of media and the distinct lack of anything other than sewer class. Largest offending programming includes The Jeremy Kyle Show, which has in fact been placed on television screens almost continually by the sewer class in order to ‘educate’ s**m about the ‘s**m manifesto’. Jeremy Kyle is in fact an ex-alcoholic and gambler who, although he appears to be trying to change the lives of people on his show, is in fact in on the rise of the sewer class by placing the show on television. The show now has an American version, a sure fire sign that once s**m has taken over Britain, it intends to engulf the entire world. Other programmes include television soaps. S**m sees what happens on these shows and thinks it is normal to do what is on them. Think back to television programmes of the past and note the reduction in non-s**m characters and depictions of non-s**m life.
I am appealing to the Old Guard of Blackpool and the Old Guard across the whole of the United Kingdom to fight back with the steadfast knowledge that we are above them. We can only hope the Old Guard will rise again. Do it now before England becomes a seething cesspit catering only to the needs and desires of s**m. This is what it wants and when it finally manages to engulf the whole of the British Isles, remember where it started: The great British holiday capital, Blackpool.