Borough of Enfield

To be honest I really don’t know where to start. This borough is full of absolute idiots; i grew up a road off edmonton and from the age of around  16/17 realised it would always be an uphill struggle to reside here. Edmonton is essentially the ‘urban’ part of the borough,what ever that means. It consists of an upper and a lower section. The vast majority of people I know from here believe the world owes them something. These characters enjoying stabbing/shooting/burning each other and their idea of a conversation is merely making self absorbed statements about how they indeed live a gangster streetlife like Pablo Escobar. Alternatively some of the residents  have twee evocations about olde london where ‘people were decent’ and these lot, at bottom, support the bnp. The ‘gangsters’ in many cases buy exceptional cars on hire purchase but reduce them to trash by modifications, usually the result is more trashy than cars on that absurd programme ‘pimp my ride.’ Edmonton/tottenham is the place where you are most likely to end up in a body bag in london. I stand by this statement, I have friends in South London and Brent and none of these areas feel as dangerous as edmonton/Tottenham. Tottenham will be dealt with subsequently when I write about Haringey.

Enfield town is more of your run of the mill ‘eastenders’ style **** paradise, like  a mini romford… At times the edmonton ‘gangsters’ end up there but in more cases than others its strictly inhabited by single mums and 14 year old kids with excessive spiky hair and four earings, at times rhyming cockney slang is used and people there only like only r & b music. You know what it isnt even just the way these people look that bothers me, I have shaved hair and wear clothes that aren’t exactly aristocratic; its more the pointless reaffirmation of how you should live a pointless life with no ambition. A perfect example can be drawn from a nightclub called eros.Which is now closed. Enfield town is the most annoying place on the planet and should be evacuated and then carpet bombed.

Southgate is if anything for some strange reason treated like a St tropez almost marbella part of the borough; arseholes in new bmws with black tinted windows who congregate at the bp petrol station near asda and consistently act like dicks. These people have exceptionally wealthy parents but insist on wasting their priviledges on 30,000 pound cars and have friends from Edmonton.

How grim is your Postcode?

Winchmore Hill is simply a no mans land of boredom. Many of the people from the aforementioned areas use this as a place to ‘link’ [aka meet eachother in a social context] It masqurades as middle class but there are some A1 ******** living here – dodgy characters….

Oakwood, again, is essentially an underground station with a few shops/restaurants. Its  quite middle class, from my experience people from here are  the same stock as those from southgate. Further on from Oakwood is Cockfosters which is actually ok. I wouldn’t mind living here as its more out of the way, if you like.

Ponders End, Enfield wash are as bad as edmonton and  geographically connected to it. The sorts of people that dwell here and in brimsdown are killers in the making. Unreasonable, aggresive 28 year old kids. I’d say there is a strong case that these people may even have guns or other sorts of calvary/perhaps a light infantry that could be used in a warlike campaign.

All in all its a terrible borough, the irony of it all is that it seems to be the british mentality to behave like this. When I return I will be discussing the borough of Haringey.

And one day I will be living abroad away from all this.