Woodgate Valley, Birmingham

‘woodgate valley’ when you hear those words ‘wood’,’gate’ and ‘valley’ together you may think of open country side, fluffy animals and clear streams. If you did, – you would be wrong. NO, in fact Woodgate Valley is the total opposite. Based in south west Birmingham, this slumish council estate is the home to every offender, single mom and local drunk ever to survive.

There are large groups of teenagers who get drunk. smoke and abuse each other ’til all hours in the morning. THESE ARE THE NEW **** ERA. the amount of burberry caps, rockport and lacoste tracksuits you see in a day is enough to put any other town to shame. Even thr 5/6 year olds are found on the street till late at night smashing up random cars.

There are a group of shops named as ‘biggies’ this consists of a ‘chippie’ outdoor and hairdressers, this is the **** heaven. there are often drinks promotions such BOGOF frosty jacks and 2 for the price of 1 tenants super, which makes a friday night on the valley quite exiting for the *****.

How grim is your Postcode?

There is a shop called ‘cakies’ which sells Greggs type food for double the price, which is good if you’ve got ‘munchies’ but once the owner was allegedly caught doing nasty things in the ice buns so got shut down. They also sold foreign **** 20 for £5 which was a bit of a bargain for the ***** and used to buy 2 boxes a day. then you got hobspns for the older *****, a big piss up til 12 o clock then round to valley spice for a chineesee, this is the life for people blessed enough to live on this lovely beautiful country estate.