Written by Anonymous Visitor and posted in South East

Ah whitehill… I spent the first 6 or 7 years of my life in this place and I swear it wasn’t a s**t hole when I lived there!!! Now it seems to be a wonderful breeding ground for chavs, chavettes and pikeys! From far far away you can smell the cheap aftershave and the smoke from this variety of chav! The girls wear about 3 inches of make-up on their face to try and look good, but when it rains…. oh dear oh dear, clown-itus strikes! They have to quickley run to the nearest toilet with their make-up, and re-apply. I dont think they even bother to take the previous days make-up off, they just shove it on top coz they all seem to be harvesting a huge amount of spots under all the foundation and blusher! Burberry isnt that common in Whitehill… they favour Helly Hanson, Le Coq Sportif and Fred Perry… I guess fake burberry just isnt their style!!
The chav scum flock here every Friday night to go to the “Top of the world” which is just a big hill with a bench at the top that they use for sitting on to smoke joints. Bless them… I suppose the fact that they can afford drugs means they are slightly upper class pikeys/chavs, but all the same, they look, act and smell like chavs do. You can hear them a mile off, shouting their heads off and you more often than not hear “oiiii Sooooowfeee!” being bellowed from some distant place.
A person my mate knows, (i am not going to mention any names) has been known to take advantage of the chavs whilst they are in a drunken/stoned state. Whilst they are all getting high at the “Top of the world”, he sits there with his BB gun randomly shooting them, and seeing as its in the dark, in the woods, the chavs dont know where the hell its coming from!! They start randomly swearing trying to make insults. Such examples of this are “Oi ya fukin twat ya c**t! We know who ya’ar n we gonna fukin merk ya” but the funni thing is that wen they realise they dont know where they are, they swiftly move off the hill and onto the road. Strange that… seeing as theyre apparently hard as nails!
When i have occasionally walked past them in this state, they won’t start on you because they havent got the speed or the balance, so they just stand and stare at you and give you the old verbal abuse again! Bless them and their limited language… I’d love to spend a day with a chav (blindfolded of coarse, i wouldn’t wanna be blinded by the fake bling) just to count how many words they use, i reckon they know a maximum of 200 words, maybe 250 if you include their little made up words which even they dont know what they mean!
I think the funniest thing ever is when you get the uber chavs who DONT actually know what a chav is, so when you walk past them and you yell out “CHAV SCUM!!!” they dont actually know if its an insult or not! You even get them askin “whats a chav?” and i just stand and laugh! I find it hilerious myself!
Anyway I’m done bitching about this s**t-hole for now, so ta ta for now, come back soon!!