Written by Anonymous. Posted in West Midlands

I have lived in this place for 7 years now and to my knowledge it is the only mass Kev/Chav breeding ground I know of. These lesser species of human pop out of single, divorced slag’s stomachs like theres no tomorrow. Only being about 16 years younger than their moms in the first place, its no wonder they’re confused.

Already wearing Nike and Burberry at the age of 2, these ‘youngsters’ are in the process of being groomed in the ways of anti-socialism, racism with such phrases as “ge bac too ya on cuntry” (return to your homeland) and womanising. At the age of 7 they are carted off to Junior Kev school which in this area are called Princethorpe, Paganel and Jerviouse. About now they should start smoking and carrying various items like crowbars and steel sticks (one size batters all). Here they will learn the fine arts of stealing (taxing), boxing (Kev’s choice sport) and for the more advanced Kevlings, arson.

After being tutored well, they move to senior school, which for them means only one place, Shenley Court. This school is a cesspit, Kevs as far as the eye can see and its everyman for himself. They hunt in packs and prey on alone, vulnerable children who again are half the size of them. Robbing and rushing as they go. Being beaten up, harassed in the showers or having all and sundry of things thrown at your head are experiences that have effected almost every normal person in the school from one time to another. The school even has its own security guards there that are SUPPOSED to keep things quiet but can often be found bummnig ‘twos’ off bagheads around the back of the English block.

The main area they like to hang out in is the ‘Square’ which has a Somerfield, Booze Busters (cheap, no questions asked, alcohol) and a cheaper version of Poundland called Smash ‘n’ Grab (clue is in the title). To normal everyday people, this place is the main shopping area. But after about 8:00 the Kevs tear themselves away from their favourite pastime of wandering around aimlessly or watching paperview porn that they found under their dad’s bed to go and vandalize shops that will later need to buy things and then wonder why it has closed early, start fights with random passers by that are about 4 foot 2 inches and terminally ill or sit there and get high on ‘spliffs’ that are 2cm long while watching their mates do burnouts and race around in their Vauxhall Novas reaching top speeds of 15mph as they are weighed down by their 2 tonne stereo which costs more than the car itself anyway.

When the long, hard journey of becoming a fully-fledged Kevite is done. It is time to set little Dwain free and into the big wide world where he can fulfil his dreams of playing for England and ending up becoming a electrician, a plumber or finally the most revered job around, the dustbin man.

So if you ever wondered why there are so many w*****s moving into your area and where they are all coming from, now you know.

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