Ah, good old Uckers.
Uckers is a many sided town. On one hand, you have the fat middle aged beer swigging cricket players (but we love them), the fat old aged beer swigging pentioners and on the other, the fat middle aged beer swigging *****.
The ***** come in all different shapes and sizes, you have the **** mums with thier Lolita like **** girls in crop tops and bling, the teenage girl ***** with the Croydon face lift, face curtocy of Superdrug and an addiction to Elizabeth Duke at Argos. The boys, are 4 foot tall, high pitched ******* with a love of ‘Carberini’ and proclaming everything ‘Cushty’.
They mainly hang out in the glamourous spots of Halfords, McDonalds, Under 16 nights at the Broadway where the girls get off with eachother, and that weird seating area behind Tescos where the Civic Center is.
But I suppose, without *****, we wouldn’t be on this list, so I thank them for that. *******.