Tipton, West Midlands

Tipton used to be one of the worst towns in England but it’s improved a bit in the last 10 years with regeneration and better places to live. But it’s a real **** town where nearly everyone under the age of 20 wears a baseball cap and a hoodie.

The **** capital of Tipton is the Lost City which is a grotty council estate called Moat Farm, it was built in the 1930’s. ***** and their sexy ******** girlfriends hang around drinking and smoking and taking drugs, as well as grafhiting and vandalising fences. It’s at the back of one of Tipton’s 2 Asda stores (the other is at Great Bridge) and there’s loads of cheap cider on sale, and really generous staff who will (allegedly) sell cider to 14 year olds.

Another ****** part of Tipton is the Tibbington estate about half a mile west of the Lost City. Like the Lost City it is a drab 1930’s council estate full of boarded up houses and trashed cars at the roadside. No pubs in this area, the only place to get lager is the local off licence where shopkeeper are too scared to ask for I.D if a teenager asks to be sold lager.

How grim is your Postcode?

In Tipton town centre next to the canal is a **** hang out called Coronation Gardens which has been around since the queen was crowned back in 1953. But ***** hang round Coronation Gardens all the time now, sniffing glue and smoking weed. Nowadays ***** and ********* are about the only people who hang around Coronation Gardens, because everyone’s scared of them even the grebos. There’s not many grebos living in Tipton and the few grebos living there have nearly all been battered by the ***** – just like the 3 fish who got battered in the Tipton central fish bar!!!

The most famous pub in Tipton is the Pie Factory on Five Ways near the border with Sedgley. Except hardly any ***** ever go in because they get booted out by the barman for being too young. Loads of ***** and ********* hang round outside, asking for older boys and girls to buy booze for them. And after getting drunk outside the pub they go up onto the Shrubbery (another of Tipton’s huge collection of trashy council estates) and cause chaos until after midnight, ******* round outside people’s houses and throwing bricks at cars.

Tipton is a real ****-town, over 90% of the population aged under 20 are ***** or *********.