‘The Ditch’ – AKA Redditch

West MidlandsWorcestershire

Redditch is literally a ditch in the centre of England, furthest point from the sea (or so i’m told) and a congregational spot for the sad species known as ‘*****’. These small unwitting creatures like to hang around the town centre in large groups (these ***** are pack hunters, most only grow to about 4ft tall – safety in numbers) making rude and ignorant comments to just about any other member of the public that doesn’t dress in exactly the same clothes as them.

Favourite ******* points – (actually come to think of it, **** hangings would be quite fun to watch) Mcdonalds, Burger King, JJB, All-sports.. well just about any shop that sells sports gear or fast food. And as the Kingfisher shopping Centre is none smoking there is usually a fair few ******* around outside the exit doors cramming in another ***.

And yes, as you very well suspected the night life is also poor, local pubs consisting of yates or the liten tree, where the ***** go get slapped up! woo!

So if you have no reason to come to Redditch other than to visit – don’t bother unless you want to get spat on, stabbed, abused or just constantly asked for a ***! Otherwise I suppose Redditch isn’t that bad….


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