Make no mistake, Thame is quite posh, however, it is also an inbred s**t town!
The striking thing about Thame and its residents is that everyone seems to be related, everyone seems to have gone out with everyone and everyone has a village mentality to the extent that they fear venturing into small surrounding towns. The people and the place have a very ‘redneck outlook’ – it is strictly a caucasian place – No asians and no blacks – in Thame they like their folk white! The people remind me of the banjo playing rednecks in the film Deliverance.
The highlight of the week is to meet on Fridays and Saturdays at one of the many s**t pubs and ‘nightspots’ (Haha!). You could start at the Abingdon Arms, affectionatly known, amongst the tractor driving corn chewer’s, as ‘The Abbo’)(?) after bumping into all of your relatives and ex’s why not stroll along to the Birdcage. After enjoying some local ale at the ‘Birdie’ with your dad who is really your brother, why not hop on to your combine harvester and make your way over to one of two brilliantly s***e nightspots, Jimmy Figg’s and Murphy’s. The only thing worse than a town c**v is a small town c**v and in Thame you will find plenty of Ben Sherman’d up small town geeezers with their fake bake wearing ladies! In Jimmy Figgs and Murphy’s it is c**v galore. Most of the regulars belong to the extremely s***e Van Demons Housing Estate – an urban toilet!
During the week the c***s like to large it in their Nova’s and ‘maxed up’ Fiesta’s. You can find them congregating in the market square or hanging at the local BP garage or speeding around Thame with their 13 year old blinged up girlfriends.
The highlight of Thame is the annual fairground when all the yokals revert back to their c**v roots and have a true chavfest, infact the whole town is sealed off to accomodate their c**v brethren and their fairground.
So if you really wanna marry your sister or call your brother dad, and you like to dress in Burberry dungarees and wear a straw hat whilst riding a tractor – Thame is for you!