Last Saturday we decided to go shopping and as we had not visited Stevenage for a while we thought (in our infinate wisdom) things may have changed.
How wrong can you bloomin well be!!..Within minutes of stepping into the Westgate Centre we were almost crushedby the mass of Burberry and sportswear clad chavs! You think thats bad but it seemed that the single mum population had increased too!!
After 1/2hr of the most horrific sceneswe had ever encountered we decided to plan the great escape we had already started to chok on the CK one fumes not to mention the constant waft of donuts,greasy burgers & various other heart attck material whilst running through the Town Centre!
We stood and observed the young Chavs and Chavettes walking by..fag in one hand and armed with the tackiest handbag they could find from the market that would resemble Burberry or Prada!
Hair slicked back with value hairspray and tied so tight to their head we were surprised it wasn’t coming away at the roots it looked so painful!
Roaming the streets plastered in Collection 2000 make up and screwing their faces up at every passer by!..Stinking Attitude the lot of em’.
The Chav boys with their chape sovereign rings and ‘phat’ chains from Warren James (a cheaper version of Elizabeth Duke). Clad from head to toe in sportswear currently in the sale from ‘sport and soccer’.
Trainers either stolen from some other poor bastard of the pin green estate or the Chav single parent has brought them from ‘priceless shoes’ or ‘value world’..and these are the potential breeding partners for the young Chav slags,both are usually sexually active even though they are only 12!!
How nice,innocent taxpayers will end up funding them for the rest of their sorry lives!!
Now what hope do the ever so fast growing population of Stevenage Chavs have?..when parents (or more often that not PARENT) are fag smoking,special brew drinking,layabout dolites who spend their money child benefit on macdonalds for the brats and fags and cheap bling for who they are currently shagging. These poor little sods have been shown the way by their peers and will carry on the Chav invasion into their own generation,it will never stop!!
Anyway,we made it back to the lift to the to take us to the car (hoping it wasn’t up on bricks) and as were just about to breath a sigh of relief not one but TWO Chavettes tried to fit their double buggies into our already crowded lift!!..blinded by the light of their bling we were beginning to wonder whether we would ever make it out alive!
Finally safe and on our way back to Hitchin (we were only cut up twice by Chaved up boy racers) we cast our minds back to that 1/2 hr of hell we have experienced in the stinking s******e that is Stevenage and vowed never to let it happen again
The Nidge is for Chavs only!!!