A town’s chavviness is usually in direct proportion with the size or success of it’s local JJB Sports shop. Well, quite recently, Stafford’s branch was extended considerably, so as to triple in size. I think that speaks volumes.
During the day, there are many establishments for the entertainment of the local chavs. Stafford town centre includes:
McDonalds -The headquarters and main meeting place for younger chavs, a place where they discuss ASBOs and fire the paper wrapper from their straws at the elderly and vulnerable;
The aformentioned JJB;
TK Maxx – For all your tracky bottom and cheap ‘designer’ clothing needs;
A multitude of phone shops – Where you can spot which phone is ‘the phone to steal’ bacause you need a phone that you can loudly play Sean Paul or G-Unit on the bus with;
A decent sized Bargain Booze – enough said;
A McDonalds Drive-Thru – Where else would you show off your Corsa 1.1 with it’s extensive ‘modifications’ including four exhaust pipes of a 4-inch diameter?
At night there is a Zanzibar night club, where fake ID may or may not be required, and for the chav elders, there’s a Chicago Rock Cafe, where all manner of ‘wedding DJ’ style music is played.
Stafford is a chav town for the future. The council estates of Highfields, Rising Brook, Coton Fields and the entire North End of the town are a rich breeding ground for our Nike AirMax baseball cap wearing chums.