Slap n Tickle the city of Riccall!!

North EastYorkshire

Where to begin – Riccall – Officially a village but well deserving of a **** city title!!

We have the fantastic amazing RSC – Riccall Service Crew who think they’re hard as ne thing however if u took them to the East End of London they’d panic and shat their pants!!

Little boys who wanna play with the big boys!!

These lads wander around the **** capital of the vale of York thinking they can abuse ‘normal’ people. They r far from normal and have many screws loose. They have lots of mates because if u’re not their mates they’ll put a brick thru your window. Their regular hang outs are the following:

1. The graveyard- A sinister place at night – U think u’re safe but eyes r watching u. Wot a lovely place for the dead to rest in an abundance of pot smokers!!

2. The Hare and Hounds – Where will you wil find the landlord needs all the custom he can get becuase of what a major ***** and letch he really is – **** jockey the famous fooking footballer!!

3. The bus stops -These are regularly trashed every weekend and require council intervention every monday morning. This tends to be the haunt 4 the under 14’s who’ ve nicked booze off their mam!!

4. The Regen Centre – A National Lottery initiative that has been turned into **** capital with frequent sightings of burberry caps; tracksuit bottoms also the 8 carat PHAT chains that they get their knees caught in tryin to attempt an original ‘GANSTA MAN’ walk!! and many a fight when battle of the bands occurs!! The police may as well put up a tent to report crimes!!

And so we continue – If u move here or even visit, you will find plenty of nice B&B’s however do NOT attempt to walk into either pub and feel that u will b made to feel welcome – LOCAL PUBS 4 LOCAL PEOPLE. This includes the post office; cost cutters and other areas!! (Royston Vasey revisited)

THE WRECK!!! – Supposed to be a recreational ground with lovely swings n play area, including a basketball hoop!! Just 4 those who play the game (none!!) This area of the village is used for random *** acts and plenty of drug intakes!! Many a late nite party has been held here (video evidence availiable – Believe us!!)

The village green – What can be said – Well it’s opposite the letch’s pub who thinks he can control this public area from people drinking alcohol – however he does not control the whole village and thinks he is mayor but he is not!!

Behind the doctor’s surgery lies waiting 4 your pleasures (surprise it ain’t been robbed yet) a opening 4 easy access 2 prescribed drugs and a lovely place to have a quickie or long shag and hope u don’t give a resident of the old folk’s home a heart attack!!

So there we have it a village that should by right be crowned the WORST **** area of the vale of York – 4GET SELBY COME TO RICCALL SELBY’S LOVE CHILD!! U’ll have a blast, if u wanna get blanked that is or fancy a laff or punch up!! – COME JOIN US!!


Top 10 worst places to live in England 2021