Berkshire   |    South East   |  

_Amid the housing estates in this relatively nice district, a disturbing scurry of thieving identical appearing rats survives and breeds. A nuclear war can’t destroy the vermin you know! There is a little shopping parade where they all surface and congregate in order to drink cans of rat-lager, shout rat-talk and to indulge in rat-spitting competitions. Nothing else to do after leaving rat-school at sixteen perhaps? They do it all night unless one of them can afford to buy in some rat-chips, and even then they throw those at passers-by for some reason. Intelligent little creatures. On a rainy day they’ll do their best to pack seven at a time into their best mates older brother’s rotting hatchback for an intellectual rat-chat about how tough they are. After that they’ll drive around and around the estates for a quick burn out and a few rat-brake turns. Impress the lady rats, quick! A quick visit to one of the shops/garages for a pack of the cheapest packs of rat-fags between them before heading back down to the drains at 1am. What a night of rat-entertainment. So then, home to mother rat for a good rat-slapping, and the rest of the night in the bedroom to dream about owning your very own A-reg Merc which has got a wide exhaust pipe. Yes, we’re all so scared….and of course, SO impressed.
Advice: Get an education, loose your attitude and most of all…. get your own dress style.







Top 10 worst places to live in England 2018