Reasons why I will never return to Glasgow

Scotland. Anyone who has dared to venture there will agree with me in saying it’s one of the strangest places on earth. I played a gig there and what I found may distress and permenantly leave you in a state of bloody hatred and/or fear. Outside the pub we played in were a group of classy blokes with their super sexy burberry caps and even more arousing lacoste jumpers. We notices they were making brilliant modifications to their Ford Fiesta (in my opinion it REALLY didn’t need it). We went up to them and started a harmless little ****-match. Harmless until one SLAPPED my band mate. They ran off like **** girls and giggled all the way.
We followed the reaking ****-trail (piss) and found at least ten sports shops, five McDonalds, about fifteen chavletts and three modified cars.
The next day we left and we hope never to return to the weirdest country on earth. If I had the choice I would put all of Scotland in the submission. Shudder.

Scotland is a much better place since Glasgow Rangers got liquidated in 2012!! Unfortunately they started a new club called sevco scotland then re named it very similar to the original Rangers and all the original Rangers fans came back out the woodwork

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