Newent has to be included in this website because not only isit the smallest town in here but its not a town of c***s, oh no this is much worse its a town of c**v wanabees!!!
But thats not the best part, i have found out that (through no fault of my own) there is a gang called the newent massive!
1. How can that happen there is barely anyone who lives there?
2. Most of the “c***s” are about 10-14!
So how can they be massive… either way it puzzles the crap out of me!
I especially like where they hang out, there is this tiny little bus stop outside a doctors near a very small police station, so if they are even thick enough to try and do any damage whatsoever the police wont have to go far will they. Lets face it guys not the best place to hang out hey…. “ahhh, if only they had a braincell between them.” But im sure were over that!
I also love the fact that the “chavettes” have their handbags, look all tarted up and have caked their faces with make up even though there just going out for a great night of roaming the streets! The lads however just throw on anything, they know it doesnt matter what they look like because we all think there ugly anyway.. They look like they have been painting the frontroom with their dad all day and have got more on their clothes than the walls! The same applies here with every other town where you have to be at least 30-40 meters away before they shout something offensive at you just incase you can catch them and beat the crap into there group of 50! Can you imagine if they didnt have the braincell to punch or swear at someone? They would be shagged!!
They hang around this crappy little car park (which if anyone has read, resembles the very much downgraded version of the farnborough cruise that surrounds mcdonalds) its kind of like 2-3 cars parking up and if u add them altogether has the potential to become one half modded fiesta 1.1 🙂
Two other local “c**v” spots are around the lake, and outside budgens car park. Obviously pushing trolleys around and looking at water is the best past times they can come up with… 😐 Again i will go back and use the “ahhh, if only they had a braincell between them” sentence.
So if u enjoy viewing trousers tucked into socks and a strong smell of cider coming from the corner of the street then you will love to come to Newent.