Newcastle-under-Lyme, Staffordshire or Castle as is affectionately called is a c**v spotters paradise.
Please make the effort to go there on the local town festival cum parade cum piss up cum all out brawl.
Watch in awe at the logistics as police barracade side streets…
Laugh in derision at local landlords screwing down the outdoor pub furniture…
Hark! the first smashed pane of glass of the day, and it’s only just 12!
This annual feature of the midlands sees local little kids parading through the town centre twirling batons and their parents cooing and aahing from behind reinforced steel barricades.
Warning: Please do be in before dark. The NHS is under enough pressure.