Liverpool, Currently European Capital of C**v’s

MerseysideNorth West

I had to agree with the person’s comment about Liverpool. After spending most of my life growing up in Newark (Another C**v Town) we moved to Liverpool last year, no I don’t know why either. Luckily, I spend most of the year at university in Manchester.

This summer has got to be one of the worst for me. I’ve been working as a tempory postman for the summer and I often deliver mail in some of the roughest parts of the city. The ammount of times I’ve been threatened with violence just because someone was expecting something, mail being late or they haven’t got their giro.

Not all scousers are bad but there are so many who make you feel unwelcome. If you go into a pub in the area I live, not wearing sportswear or speaking proper English you get some real dirty looks from the inbread locals. When I’m at university in Manchester, at least locals are a lot more welcoming in comparison to their Merseyside neighbours.

The concept of fashion hasn’t reached Liverpool yet, everyone wears tracksuits especially blue Lacoste or Real Madrid ones. Scousers say they don’t like being stereotyped but go to Liverpool and you will see so many people in “trackies” like Harry Enfield. Plus, there is so much car crime, vandalism, violent crime! So many buildings are boarded up but you’re never far away from a tanning studio, beauty salon, cheap jewellry shop, Greggs. Oh, and they are so many crap pubs outside in the ghetto’s usually next to a betting shop(Scouse C**v’s usually spend their dole money on trainers, tracksuits, or in their local while blowing the rest on the horses.) Whenever I see a c**v in the street, I feel superior to them in so many ways such as:

1. I’ve actually been to school and got GCSE’s and A levels. I’m now at university. I’ve got ambition unlike these scouse c**v’s.

2. I speak in a correct manner.

3. I am actually bothered to get a job and not live on the dole. Benefits should help those who need it, not some c**v’s who cannot be bothered to do a proper day’s work. (I’ve got 2 jobs at the moment)

4. I do not have a criminal record.

5. I haven’t made a 16 year girl pregnant nor am I a father of kids whilst I was a teenager.

Loads of money is being spent on European Capital of Culture 2008, yet how many c**v’s are going to visit places like a theatre, art gallery, museuems or even go to school? Millions is being spent on projects that will only benefit Liverpool’s non-c**v population (the minority) Who can tell me what city is the current capital of culture? No, I don’t know either. Liverpool is a city living under false pretences.

You cannot fail to spot a c**v in Liverpool, especially in the city centre. I go non- c**v spotting, its more of a challenge! Usual hangouts include greggs one of 1000’s in Liverpool, fastfood outlets, St John’s precinct is the worst shopping centre ever, it makes Manchester’s Arndale Centre look good. It has your usual sportswear, Ming Bling, fake perfume stores. Inside it is so dark and dingy and so small.

One thing I can complement Liverpool on is Lime Street station its an eyesore but its the gateway to the rest of the UK even thats full of c**v kids smoking weed even though the place is full of transport police.

If you want to come to “C**v Mecca” remember the following things.

1. Don’t wear a tracksuit, you don’t want to be one do you?

2. Don’t carry cash, you’ll probably get your wallet nicked. I always carry a decoy one filled with monopoly money when I’m in Liverpool, there is a possibly you might get mugged, then they will feel stupid!!!

3. Carry some kind of weapon, pepper spray is my choice.

4. Expect verbal abuse from its c**v population, especially kids.

5. Go to Manchester, its still full of c**v’s but you’ll feel safer!!!!

European Capital of Culture, My A**e!!! To misquote one of Liverpool’s famous son’s, Ricky Tomlinson.

Top 10 worst places to live in England 2019