Littlehampton (L.A)

Littlehampton… ahh the memories. Having only moved to the place when I was 16, I missed a lot of the pre-teen **** activities and groups that may have tainted my life and sucked me under.. I managed to get into the ‘normal’ crowd, but even then the chavity is un-avoidable. Many an evening would be spent sitting on Mewsbrooks park bench on a freezing December night in the run up to Christmas drinking cider and singing ‘The Fairytale of New York’.. Sometimes there would be a stereo attached to the back of someones bike.. someone would inevitably end up in the river, someone else snogging their mates sister.. I fell in love with my first boyfriend after he decided to run into a wall..

Ahh the romance, walking down by the river Arun, past the chippy (the best in the south apparently) feeding the malnourished swans bits of kebab.. sitting on the pier (I think they had the cheek to call it one) pretending to be Kate Winslet on Titanic.. cycling down the promenade, dodging the syringes and nappies and … no the beach was actually ok, apart from the lack of sand… if you crossed the river and walked far enough one could find the (rumour has it) nudist beach..

Apparently there’s a *** shop in town now. I still have yet to find it. Would have sent a murmur of disapproval throughout the older generation of rustington/LA border old biddy homes… which there are plenty of.. what a place to come to die…

How grim is your Postcode?

But I spent the majority of my late teens still glowing with the novelty of a small town and lots-of-friends-who–know-each-other-and-probably-slept-together who like to sit on the beach and drink cider.. (most have left, gone to uni or had a baby.. to join the crowd of Saturday afternoon mums cavorting down the high street with pushchair and 3 screaming kids in tow, shouting ‘Britney, get over here’.. you get the drift..)

So yes, welcome to LA, famous for Roy Whiting, Britains second highest teenage pregnancy stastic, and Fred’s fish and chips. And The Body Shop… betcha didn’t know that!

Top 50 worst places to live in England 2022 as voted for by you

Littlehampton/ LA

I couldnt agree more with theother LA message; I went to LA school a few years ago and even now, so one has changed. Ford market is like a ritual on a Sunday morning, they go tooled up with their ‘**** Royalty’ size earings, fake burberrys/ louis vuittons and a brat/ mini **** in tow.
The lads are typical *****, baseball caps, keeper and soverign rings with big chain and bracelet.
Birds, showing all of what they’ve got and some of them have a bit more than others!

Harbour park is a meeting area and the opubs mentioned before are spot on.
The George is where you’ll find all the ***** mums first thing on a saturday and will stay there most of the day then on Sunday, the kids are in for a real treat as they are all carted of to Brewsters to meet all the other **** families!

Shieks is a very popular club in Bognor where loads of LA ***** go to on a regular basis or if you fancy a real treat, then you will be going to the Tower Club in LA over the weekend although ‘The House of Soul’ (previously knwona s The Cow) has been opended.
***** name, ***** pub (trying to be a club) ***** people!

How grim is your Postcode?

To sum LA up, if you were born there, and still live there, you’ll probably never leave.
Your children and grandchildren will be bought up there and the ******** known as Littlehampton, will always be knwon as a ********!

Top 50 worst places to live in England 2022 as voted for by you