Leicester Square

West London

Funny story about playing **** spotting. The one that normally plague my existence hang around West Drayton but on this occasion one strayed into The Big L…..I will tell you the story….

One fine day me and my other half decided to go to London, around Piccadilly etc, and for the journey we decided to play **** spotting. We decided that the scoring system will be one point for JJB sportswear, two points for the rolled up socks over trainers, and three points for an item of Burberry. So we counted quite a lot around Greater London, but as we ventured more into London they were a bit thin on the ground, and everyone were mostly tourists or snotty PR types who lunch and have high-pitched voices that only bats can hear, just to confirm their existence (another group of egregious types that can be made into a website perhaps????)

Anyway, we gave up on the **** spotting and had a drink and shop. Eventually we forgot about the ****-spotting game until we wondered past Stringfellows and what do we see?? A Burberry Capped, JJb wearing, rolled up socks proper **** !!! A full six pointer!! Trying to get into Stringfellows! And getting very told-to-go-away by the three burly security guards!!

We laughed and laughed and laughed…and got a few strange looks…but we carried on laughing with glee! Also felt quite ‘justified’ as the **** had got his come-uppance!

Moral of the story….Expand London to such an extent that the whole of England will become one big Uber-city…and drive the ***** awayyyyy!!! Forever!!

Top 10 worst places to live in England 2020