Written by Anonymous. Posted in Uncategorised

Not many childrens activities can be classed as violent, abusive, foulmouthed, threatening and having a total lack of respect for authority but kids saturday/sunday league football ticks all the boxes. No “Joga Bonita” in these leagues where kids are able to express themselves playing free flowing skilful football without fear of losing. This is because their scumbag parents drill into them from an early age that they must win at all costs, no matter who you upset or step on, even if you have no skill or ability, you are told that you are a worldbeater.

The pitches where I play my saturday league games often have junior football matches going on before the adults turn up to play in the afternoon and some of the things the parents get up to would make you sick, even if they were committed in an adult league. The kids aren’t that bad, they are probably scared of their parents beating the living s**t out of them when they get back after losing their top of the table clash Vs St. Lukes under 9’s. You get parents shouting foulmouthed threatening abuse at the other teams parents, the F word is used every 2 seconds and shouts of “I’ll fuckin do you yer c**t” or “Come ere and say that yer fuckin prick” are quite common.

My mates Dad ran an under 10’s team for 5 years but all he was was a glorified babysitter while the parents fucked off to the pub or stayed in bed. He even had to collect most of them cos they were too lazy to take them to the game, put up the posts and nets by himself and was always out of pocket when it came to collecting subs because the parents were too mean to give their kid a couple of quid to pay for the cleaning of the kit.

When any of the parents ever bothered to turn up it was usually to give him grief about how he ran the team or why their little s**t was dropped from the team. Whenever any of them were offered to do a better job they said they didn’t have time, despite a few being on the sick or working part time. Yep – he didnt have time either in between his job and travelling a 2 hour round trip every day to work. Lazy pricks. He got so fed up with it he was confronted by a prick parent asking why his son was dropped despite not scoring all season he just said “Well actually your son is f*****g shite” and walked off to the bemusement of the parent who thought his kid was going to be the new Robbie Fowler.

Then there is the referees, yes these poor unfortunate “bastards in black” who have had to pass a course in the laws of the game to earn their badge. What they actually earn is about £16 for 90 minutes of abuse, fear of being assaulted or killed if “our Billy” doesn’t win his meaningless game of footy. The majority of the pricks on the touchline do not know the exact laws – you can’t be offside from a f*****g throw in, yet they profess to know everything about the game and have never made a mistake in their entire life. I have seen 2 lager swilling fat w*****s come on to the pitch trying to punch the ref and were only restrained by others on the same touchline. One ref got butted in the face after a game and had his nose broken – he was only 16 and wanted experience of the little league before moving onto adult leagues, he packed in after that. On another occasion I saw a Chav try to run over another young ref in a car park whilst his kid sat in the front seat of the car. Is it any wonder why the local FA hardly have any refs and as a result many games get cancelled?. The same Chavs will then moan that little Billy has no access to competitive football and his “development” will suffer.

Is it also any wonder that some kids turn out the way they do when they see their parents as this example and display a complete lack of respect for others and anyone in authority? If other kids teams play for enjoyment it is seen as a sign of weakness by Chavs rather than having a laugh. If you want your kid to act like a total twat in later life get them to join a team ASAP!!!

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