Written by Anonymous Visitor and posted in United Kingdom

Where do i begin? Hayes is a suburb situated in Middlesex. I probably don’t need to say alot as it is the birth place (or at least initial establishment) of one of the most infamous chav crews out there, the Hayez Squad. Although many towns have chavs between the ages of 14-19 years (after this age they become more of a rarity as many end up in prison or die as a result of their drug habit) Hayes can boast the Hayez Squad. Made up of a group of loosers who are in their late twenties to mid thirties. The thing is they all have jobs (although s**t ones) yet they actually enjoy being chavs…for them its a lifestyle choice.They have a website dedicated to their chav activities and actually managed to get on TV…as representing the urban youth of Britain!! This is typical of Hayes. There are ‘wanna be’ thugs all over the area…with standard issue checked Nickleson shirts and Reebok classics everywhere you look. The place is run down and comes complete with high rise blocks of flats. Most of the shops have closed down and have been replaced by pound shops. There are very few facilities in Hayes…but what chav town would be complete without its bingo hall?…Hayes has a Mecca bingo where the lights have to be dimmed on a friday night due to the reflection off the pendants, sovereign rings, prison white trainers and caked on make-up e.t.c. Other recreational areas include odd stretches of so called ‘parks’ the grass is covered in s**t (from the standard issue chav pet..a very ugly vicous dog) or condoms which were left from the nights activities (chav having sex with his sister, dog or learning how to use a condom, but in secret as birth control and safe sex aren’t really ‘cool’ amongst chavs) The jewel in the crown of the Chavdom of Hayes is the newly opened chav superstore…LIDL..this is a one stop shop for all a chav wants..needs or could ever desire, from clown pendants …to methylated spirits (paint thinner to you and me…drunk by chavs). Another site you will see is the large number of 12-15 year old girls with babies..pushing them round in their prams. In Hayes having a baby is like winning the sweepstakes for a chav..get knocked up…and the council give you all these benefits and a flat!!!! Where you can have little chav parties and help other chavs get knocked up. You may pass this town as you head to Heathrow Airport…..you will see the signs…just keep driving…