East SussexSouth East

This town must be the birhtplace of the Chav!!!

Why??? We have known the “chav” word for ages…decades in fact…..it has always been an insult to be called a chav and many a fight has broken out because of it…….

Hailsham is very near to Eastbourne, but in terms of Chav development…….Hailsham is Light years ahead of anywhere in the area.

A guided tour:_

Chav hangouts:

War Memorial in the centre of town….Any evening of the week you can find the local Chav youth hanging out here. It used to be the place where you could go to get drunk. Very clever the Hailsham Chav’s they just *allegedly* rob the local shop…used to be Spar…right across the road and sit round the memorial getting drunk on the booze they stole.

Leisure Centre/Community centre, yes, the Hailsham chav’s even have the inclination to hang out by the leisure centre. It’s called the Lagoon this is usually a meeting place for the chavettes. Sunday nights are 5 a side football league nights for the chav dads…..we’ve got it all going on in Hailsham.

Local park or Wreck as in Eastbourne…..the summer meeting place of the local youth. You can find them sitting on the merry go round just smoking or getting drunk. Usual place for a shag as well.

Horsebridge wreck…yet another hangout for them, this is for the chavs who live on the other side of town…the so called posher end!

Council offices….very popular of a daytime…they provide customer services for chavs. A must see on the map of Hailsham.

Health centre…for an idea of the extent to which the chavs have intergrated in this town….just stand outside and watch and listen….you will truly be amazed.

Common Pond…..Common being the operative word…..even the ducks wear fake burberry and bling bling……..if you think that’s bad…check out the swans!

Quintins Shopping centre/ St mary’s walk.
These deserve a special note of attention…This is chav haven as far as Hailsham is concerned. You get a chav every 30 seconds here. Chav mums, Chav grans, Chave great grans….Chav generations flock here. The Co-op….chav central of a weekend. In fact the Co-op is *allegedly* run by the chavs! Annabelles the restaurant……more like caff (in my opinion). Well if you can see through the haze of smoke..you’ll find all manner of chavs in there…they come to discuss life on the dole and chavgossip over a fag, full english breakfast, fag, and a cup of tea with a fag. The pound shop and the charity shops are really popular as is the world renowned designer store Quality seconds or QS to you and me…..I’m sure you all know it…the chavs certainly do.

Chav pubs….(Allegedly) The Terminus/The George(*allegedly* sadly burnt by its *alleged* chav owner) The Corn exchange/The Grenadier and another one opposite the Bp garage on south rd….can’t remember the name…these are really popular with the chav’s.

Chav takeaways….Lucky Star is *allegedly* your one stop for chav chinese and chicken and chips.
Kemer kebab….locally famous *allegedly* for the older chav mum’s who want to get a bit more than a kebab late at night!!
Ken’s Fish and Chips….yes, you should see the queues on a Friday night…chav’s come form all around to get their fish and chips here.

Chav Schools

Marshlands (junior school) Education Chav style

Hailsham Community College (ex Battle Rd) 12-18 Chavs

Chav Estates

Town Farm…breeding ground of the Chav
Diplocks….breeding ground of the lesser Chav


This deserves a special mention….this is run by the CHAV MAFIA…you don’t want to mess with them….even their dogs are hard….the Chav Mafia live next door on the P***y Park…No houses for them…they still prefer the caravan…..Locals know to steer well clear of this area…there’s town chav’s then caravan chav’s..even the town chav’s don’t mess with the caravan ones.

There is an official chav uniform of trackky bottoms and a jumper….adidas is the preferred one. Used to be Nike, but that went out of fashion. The original chav mum uniform of leggings and a jumper with baby in push chair can still be seen on the streets of Hailsahm….sadly this is becoming a rarity nowadays.

Just to let you know……

Hailsham is the Chav cultural centre of the world, because we have had chav’s in this town for 1396….certain family names….(I will not mention on this site )are famous in the town. They are deeply embeded in the town history. They have been here for generations and there are loads of them……Even the police run scared of certain family names……I s**t you not.

Hailsham has to be one of the birthplaces of the chav…..

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Top 10 worst places to live in England 2019

Hailsham (East Sussex)

East SussexSouth East

Hailsham war memorial is a magnets for chavs from all over the county of East Sussex. Many a mayfair is smoked by chavs with hair stuck down with “Mega Tub ‘O’ Gel” nicely obscured by the baseball cap.
Some local chav language:
Alright my chave
Dinlow Crank
Oi chavie

Interesting local chav observations:
A hailsham chav will smoke in a very strange way cupping the hand over the fag to stop other chavs seeing the fag and asking for one.
Hailsham Chavs often wait at bus stops but never get on a bus

A local chav song:
If you cant have it chav it
cant afford it chord it

Top 10 worst places to live in England 2019