The local ***** tend to frequent the town centre on Friday and Saturday nights. Fat Gosport girls (usually fat from having 6 children by 18) shout and ball it there branded sports gear (with shoes, not trainers as they still have to adhere to club dress-codes), and are usually smothered in cheap jewellery from the assortment of pawnbrokers and cheap jewellers along the high street.

During the week the average Gosport **** hangs out on the Rowner estate. This is the local “bad” council estate where all the ***** are forced to live due to their anti-social behaviour convictions. Groups of snotty baby ***** roam the streets in branded nappies and h. Samuel infant jewellery and wearing next trainers.

When the adolescent ***** come out after dark the Rowner estate becomes engulfed in a large bellowing cloud of pot smoke, which emanates from the local kiddies parks and schoolyards.
The highlight of the Gosport ***** week is a Wednesday night when sidewalk club have a fifteen pound all you can drink night. This draws all the older ***** out of hiding. When I say old I’m talking 45 plus. They come here to “trap” local sailors so the CSA can fund their Burberry habit.

How grim is your Postcode?

All in all if you don’t have to come to Gosport DON’T.

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