Gilesgate. A small s**t hole of an area just outside of Durham. Home too some of the most disgusting people you could meet. So we’re do I start? The people who live in Gilsegate are Mainly *****, drug dealers or ***** (yes I said it again). Don’t get me wrong there are some lovely people in Gilesgate, but they are mainly old. As you walk the streets of **** heaven you will probably meet a small 11 year old threading too kick your head in too, which if you give him grief back he will then threaten to get his dad onto you. As you reach the ‘duffy’ you are officially in the **** meet up place. Where ***** wait with other ***** and go too smoke ‘lungs’ or ‘waterfalls’. Using words such as ‘shoney’ or ‘hockeys’. If you do want to ever take a stroll out of Gilesgate, just take a walk past the run down opticians, Simon Berrys (which always looks empty and run down, and turn too your left. You will shortly be in SHERBURN ROAD!
Yes I said it, Sherburn Road. Famously known for people riding bikes with ridiculous hats on, spitting drugged up teenagers and people chasing one another with machetes in their hands. Now come on. If you’re wanting to visit sherburn road, I would highly advise you not to if you aren’t from round there or Gilesgate or the other halves of sherburn. (Sherburn village and sherburn hill) you will probably get threatened. On the corner of sherburn road we have a shop that literally anyone can allegedly buy alcohol in.
Feeling hungry? Why not go to kfc in Gilesgate/sherburn road? There will most definitely get your order wrong. As it is allegedly known for bad hygiene and the smell the that comes from the place, will make you run in the other direction. Kfc car park at night however is filled with 17-20 car boys doing wheel spins and handbrake turns with there 16 year old girls in the car, that they will later take to Rennys lane tunnel too shag.
Just over the road is the ‘bowl’ well known for skater boys and ***** who smoke spliffs and take ‘cowies’ from day to night. Yet again you will meet the 11 year old threatening to get his daddy drug dealer to kick your head in if you don’t lend him a tab.
Sherburn road and Gilesgate at night is pretty peaceful, until you see the gang off their faces either looking for more drugs to ‘tick’ or can’t stay at the house party any longer because they’re too off there faces to stay in one place.
So there you have it, your guide to the chavtastic land of Costa del Gilesgate.
You know you’re from Chester-le-street when…
Willington & Sunnybrow, bleak sh*tholes somewhere in County Durham
Darlington, full of old men who still think they’re 20 but are closer to 50
Ferryhill: full of ****** jobless drugged up muppets
Ferryhill: the town’s female population are permanently pregnant
Brandon / Meadowfield, you will know that it is truly sh*t!
You know you live in Chester-Le-Street when you’ve seen…
Horden: Never make the same mistake as I did
Stanley, County Durham: Bleak, Depressing, Godawful.